


Baby Makes Four

by heartsdesire456



Series: Fangs & Fur [7]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Magazine, Alternate Universe - Parents, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-03
Updated: 2014-07-03
Packaged: 2018-02-07 06:06:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1887732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Stiles and Derek decide to adopt another child, they run into an unexpected obstacle that sends them down a painfully difficult path in hopes to adopt a child.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby Makes Four

**Author's Note:**

> SO SORRY! I know it's been forever, but I wrote 2 or 3 fics since I started this so... yeah I suck. Sorry?

Derek and Stiles were only married six months before they decided they were ready to expand their family. They talked about their options, adopting or surrogacy, and in the end they both agreed they wanted to adopt. 

_“There’s just so many children already out there,” Stiles said softly, his head resting on Derek’s chest as they talked about their future since neither of them could sleep one night. “There are so many children that need a family. They need parents who love them. It’s just irresponsible to make another baby when, for the same money or less, we can adopt children that already exist and need someone.”_

And so they began looking into adoption. They spent a long time discussing, and a little arguing, about what type of adoption they wanted to do. 

_“Stiles, I thought you wanted a baby-“_

_“I never said that! I said I wanted children! It doesn’t have to be a baby…. Wait, do you only want it to be a baby?”_

_“No, but it would be easier to start at the bottom with a newborn-“_

_“I don’t care about easy, Derek. I married a werewolf and we have a werewolf cub. I want a child however it comes, and if it’s not picking up a newborn at the hospital, I’m okay with that.”_

When they decided, finally, on finding a public agency so they could get a child that was already born, the first thing they did was hire a lawyer to help them through the process. 

It was at that point they ran into their first, and biggest, obstacle.

Stiles stared at the phone with wide, horrified eyes. “What do you mean we can’t adopt a human?” he asked in a dazed tone.

“What I mean, sadly, is that even if you are a human, Stiles, your husband isn’t. There is a federal provision that makes it so that werewolves, even one werewolf and one human, can’t adopt human children. It’s considered a risk-factor. Werewolves and humans have entirely different parenting styles and it was ruled that Species Equality doesn’t apply to adoption laws,” Sharron explained.

Stiles looked up at Derek and his heart twisted at the crushing guilt that was etched into every line of Derek’s face as he stared at Stiles, not the phone. Stiles pressed his lips together, reaching across the table to squeeze Derek’s hand. “Okay. What are our options?” Stiles asked calmly, closing his eyes in a silent prayer.

“Your only option is adopting a werewolf cub. Other Species aren’t allowed to be adopted by werewolves. Very few inter-species adoptions are allowed. In the case of humans, they are the ‘blank slate’ on an interspecies marriage. It’s very rare to find anybody other than humans married to a different species, and because of that, the non-human in the relationship decides the species of child you’re allowed to adopt-“

“So what you’re saying is, if my friend who is a Kitsune wanted to adopt a child, she could _only_ adopt a Kitsune even though they are excessively rare?!” he asked, horrified at what he was hearing. 

“Sadly, Stiles, if your friend who is a Kitsune wants to adopt, she realistically never will,” she said honestly.

Stiles gritted his teeth. “This is- I can’t even comprehend this. It’s like segregated schools all over again,” he groaned.

Sharron chuckled. “I know the feeling, Stiles. But it is what it is. You and Derek can only hope to adopt a werewolf cub, and I’m afraid that process is entirely different.”

Stiles felt Derek’s hand twitch in his and he rubbed his palm soothingly. “How so?”

Stiles heard some files rustling on the other end and Sharron spoke again. “There are less cubs up for adoption, for one thing. Your choices are limited when it comes to who you can adopt because large packs often take in orphaned cubs in the area rather than let them get to the stage of needing to be adopted. There are less abandoned cubs or mothers giving up their cubs. Usually if a cub is taken from their parent by legal action, they are immediately taken in by a large pack. Werewolves are more stuck in their choices than humans when it comes to unwanted pregnancies because even if they didn’t want or aren’t really able to care for a cub, the instincts make it nearly impossible to give it away even to the most perfect family, so the only way to really go about pre-birth adoption is for the birth mother to live with the adopting parents for the first year or two after the child is born and it usually ends in open adoption so that the mother can see her cub occasionally.”

Stiles felt his heart sink. “Sharron… are we even going to be able to adopt?” he asked sadly.

“Yes, you can,” she reassured him. “It’s just a more difficult process. There are cubs that aren’t weeded out through those processes. There are still cubs, even newborns, who are alone and in the care of the state. Generally, the process involves several sessions meeting with the psychiatrist assigned to the cub unless it’s a newborn, and in that case, the primary caregiver that takes care of the child will meet with you and one of the psychiatrists that it would’ve been assigned to later. In these meetings, you meet with and spend time with the prospective cub. If you get along and think this is the right match and the psychiatrist agrees, there is a temporary placement. You will take the cub home for a period of one month. If things go well, the adoption process starts. At this point you would’ve already passed all the background checks, home checks, and recommendations, so it’s just legal things. That process takes up to six months, but once it’s started, very little would stop it. If you manage the temporary period, the cub is as good as yours because removing the cub would cause issues after you’ve all bonded, so it’s very rare.”

Stiles bit his lip nervously. “That doesn’t sound much different, though.”

“Believe me, Stiles. It’s harder. I’ve seen it before. The background checks and recommendations involve not just you and your family, but your entire pack. The whole pack has to be approved. Often your alpha has to meet with several alphas in the area the cub is being adopted from to prove he or she is better suited for the cub than any of them. The whole process of checks takes weeks and weeks and it requires complete cooperation from the whole pack. If you weren’t from a pack, it’s unlikely you could adopt at all. Packless werewolves aren’t thought to be stable enough for a cub that isn’t theirs-“

Stiles’s eyes narrowed again. “So wait, if my best friend that is a lone beta with a human family wanted to adopt, he couldn’t?!” he asked, growing more and more angry.

“No, not unless his partner was from a pack. But single? No, he couldn’t,” she said.

“Who the fuck makes these rules?!” Stiles cried. “I understand wanting best for the children, but you can’t tell me any of this is logical!”

“I know, Stiles, but it’s how it is,” she said, trying to calm him. “Look, you guys take the night and talk this all over. Call your alpha, ask around some of the pack members, and see how you want this to go. If you want to start the process of trying to adopt a cub, the faster we get started, the faster we get all the background checks and inspections and recommendations, the faster we can start trying to pair you with a cub,” Sharron said, and Stiles thanked her before hanging up.

Derek watched as Stiles put his face in his hands and leaned against the table before silently standing and walking out. Stiles looked up, brows raised in confusion before he got up to follow Derek. He found him sitting on the couch staring ahead and Stiles swallowed hard before sitting down next to Derek, leaning into his side. “Derek,” he whispered, and Derek let his head fall forward.

“I’m so sorry,” he said tightly. “If you hadn’t married me-“ Stiles glared immediately, but Derek kept talking. “If you had married a human one day, this wouldn’t- none of this would be a problem,” he said weakly. “Fuck, I’m ruining your biggest dream-“

“Derek, _no_ ,” Stiles said firmly. He slid his arms around Derek, leaning in to kiss his forehead, stroking his hair. “Shhh, stop that. Don’t you ever apologize for marrying me, dude.” Stiles smiled faintly. “No matter what, I love you.” He pulled back to look at Derek. “Besides. We’re going to do this, you got me? It may be harder but- but we’re from a strong pack, right? We’ll have no problems there.” Stiles kissed his temple. “It’s fine. You and I have this. I want a child enough to take this.”

Derek sighed, leaning into Stiles’s hold. “We could always look into hiring a surrogate? I know Cora, Laura, and Erica won’t do it, but you can hire those-“

“ _No_ ,” Stiles said firmly.

Derek looked up. “Stiles, it would be easier. It would cost more, and it would be a little risky, but it’s an option-“

“No, it’s not!” Stiles argued. “Derek, I’m not doing that. I don’t _want_ to use a surrogate.”

Derek frowned. “But why? We could have one with your DNA-“

“I don’t care about that,” Stiles said gently. “Derek, don’t get me wrong, I love that Alex looks just like you, I do, but to me, Alex is as good as adopted because he doesn’t have my DNA, he has yours. It’s different because you had him with another woman. You were with a woman, had a cub, and it didn’t work,” he pointed out. “I love our cub because he is ours, not because he’s yours,” Stiles said simply. “I’m not going to spend tons of money to make a baby just because it’s easier and has my DNA or your DNA when there are children out there that need to be adopted.” He shook his head. “Derek, I know it’s harder, and I wish we could just adopt a human, but having to go through the process for cubs is worth it. It’s worth knowing that instead of going out of my way to put another baby on this earth when there are plenty who need me, I fought to make the list of cubs who need parents shorter.”

Derek gave Stiles such a fiercely warm look, eyes shining. “God, you are the most amazing person, Stiles.” He leaned in and kissed him slowly. “You just are so _good_.” 

Stiles shrugged. “If you want a child as much as we do, Derek, you have to be prepared to struggle. Parenting isn’t about what’s easier, or what’s less risky. It’s going to hurt, and it’s going to be hard, but if you want to be a good parent, you have to be prepared to take whatever life throws at you and make it work. If you’re not willing to fight for your child, you don’t deserve one. Surrogacy is taking the easy way out and I’m not going to do that. DNA means nothing. Family is about love, not blood. Surrogacy is literally throwing money at the want for a child just to take out the risks and heartaches and struggles. If you really want a child, you should be prepared to suffer for it because you know it will be worth it.” Stiles stroked Derek’s cheek. “I’m ready to suffer all of these struggles if it means we get a cub. Are you?” he asked. “Be honest, with me, Derek. If you’re not ready for this-“

“No,” Derek said firmly. “I’m ready to do whatever it takes. Promise.”

Stiles sighed, kissing him sweetly. “Good.”

~

Derek laid on the couch in his mom’s office, hand over his eyes. “I don’t know what to do, Mom. This process is going to hurt him so much. There is so much that can go wrong.”

Talia stroked his hair gently, smiling from her spot sitting on the arm of the couch. “Sweetheart, why don’t you guys just get a surrogate?” she asked.

Derek let out a puff of breath. “Even if we could afford that-“

“Derek, the pack can fund that, you know-“

Derek shook his head, looking up at her. “No, we don’t want it. Even if we could afford it, we don’t want surrogacy. I didn’t think about it before, but Stiles was right when he said it’s just wrong to go out of the way and spend all that money to create a new baby when there are already children out there that need families. Adopted children are not less your child than biological children, so surrogacy is absolutely pointless.” He sighed. “I just wish we could adopt humans. It would be such an easier process. We don’t necessarily want a newborn exclusively, so if you foster a child and adopt them while you’re fostering them, it’s a very easy process. We could have had a human child completely adopted within six months. Process final,” he said bitterly. “But no, since I’m a werewolf, we’re not eligible for human adoption.”

Talia’s jaw clenched. “More and more inequality,” she said tightly. “God, I’m so sorry. Stiles must’ve been so upset.”

Derek pressed his palms into his eyes. “Worse. He was more upset over me being guilty.” He looked up at his mother. “He wants more children. What happens if we can’t adopt a cub? He can be happy with just Alex, I know he can, but he _wants_ more.” Derek sighed. “ _I_ want more. I don’t want Alex to be an only child,” he said bitterly. “I don’t want to be the reason my son is an only child and my husband doesn’t get his dream of three or four children.”

Talia leaned down and kissed his head. “Derek, it’s going to be okay,” she soothed. She smiled, rubbing at the lipstick on his forehead. “Remember who your mommy is,” she cooed teasingly and Derek rolled his eyes.

“Mooooom,” he whined, shoving at her hand.

She grinned. “Hey, I play it down because I’m not that concerned with it, but I’m Alpha Hale, Derek. You’re the son of one of the most powerful Alphas on the west coast. If anybody is going to approve a couple of adopting a werewolf cub, it will be the son and son-in-law of Alpha Hale.”

Derek looked up at her, brows furrowed. “You think so?” he asked hopefully and she nodded.

“Our pack is strong, my influence is strong, our name has weight, and we have no skeletons in our closet that I can think of that would be enough to interrupt the process,” she explained.

“What about Peter killing that beta? Or… me,” he said, cringing. “Killing your first wife isn’t the best background to come up when you’re trying to adopt a cub.”

Talia scoffed. “Protecting your cub has to look good when it concerns whether or not you’re capable of caring for another. And as for Peter, he wasn’t charged with a crime over that, so they shouldn’t be able to say anything about it.” She cringed. “Peter in general however…” She trailed off and Derek snickered.

“We’ll probably just have to kill him before the interviews start,” he joked and Talia laughed.

“Aww, don’t be mean,” she said, then patted his cheek. “Now enough moping. Get up, go have lunch with your husband.” When Derek sat up, she walked to stand in front of him and pulled him into a hug, arms around his shoulders as he pressed his face into her middle. “No matter what, Stiles loves you, Honey. He loves you more than some people will ever experience and nothing will change that.”

Derek sighed. “I hope so,” he said with a pout.

Talia poked his bottom lip, making him whine and bat her hand away. She chuckled. “Even all grown up, you’re still my little cub,” she cooed, poking him in the cheek when he drew away.

“Mooooom stop!” he complained, standing up so that he was looking down at her slightly. “I’m a grown man, don’t poke me in the face-“

“Oh whatever, ‘grown man’, you still came out of my body once upon a time, so you’re my little cub forever,” she said and Derek made a face.

“Ew, Mom! Unnecessary,” he said, turning to leave.

Talia laughed and walked him to the door. “You’re starting to sound more and more like Stiles, just way less intelligent-“

“LEAVING NOW!” Derek called loudly over his shoulder as he shut the door behind himself on the way out. Talia smiled as she headed back to her desk. When she sat, she looked at her phone and sobered up some. She looked at the door, through which her hurt, afraid, and upset son had just gone, and back at the phone before making a decision. She picked it up and dialed a number she hadn’t had to dial in a long time.

~

The first step was to schedule a meeting with Sharron and Talia. They all met in a conference room at work for convenience, but the meeting was official. “Basically, the process will start with contacting the Department of Family Services and expressing interest in adopting a cub. The next step is to meet with a family liaison from the offices in charge of cub adoptions and start the background checks and scheduling interviews with all relatives that are likely to see the cub more than a few times per year and the key pack members who will be around it a lot. If that checks out, there will be a home inspection and, if you don’t live with your pack, a pack home inspection. After that you will go back to the family liaison and they will have a list of the cubs they have that match your original criteria. You will meet with any cub you want to meet, you’ll have single, couple, and cub-included counseling sessions, and if everything seems to be right, you’ll get the one month placement I told Stiles about,” she explained. “During that month you’ll be expected to let the cub interact with everyone they’ll see often so that you can be sure there won’t be any conflicts. After that, the cub will very most likely be approved for adoption.” She turned to Talia. “You will be interviewed possibly more than once, and you will have single counseling sessions, a session with just you and the cub, and a session with all of you. You will also have to meet with any alphas that might potentially challenge the adoption. Usually they _don’t_ challenge, but you still have to meet with them to prove to them that you’re the right match for a cub.”

Talia nodded, taking a few notes. “How soon can we get their meeting with the Department of Family Services to express an interest in adopting a cub?” 

“Any time between now and Friday or Monday morning,” Sharron said. “It’s not a scheduled thing as much as you go, ask to speak to someone about adopting a cub, and then get paired with the first available person to give you the paperwork you need and get you scheduled for interviews and checks.”

Stiles carefully squeezed Derek’s hand. “Sharron, what about our cub? Will we have any problems adopting another cub when we already have one?” he asked, closing his eyes as he waited for the answer, almost too afraid to see her face.

“You shouldn’t, but he will have to meet and interact with the new cub before you can adopt,” she said. “And he’ll have to meet with a psychiatrist, too. They have to know that your cub won’t have animosity towards the cub you’re adopting, especially if it’s an infant.”

Stiles nodded. “Then let’s- let’s go ahead and do this. Derek?” he asked, looking at Derek.

Derek smiled hesitantly. “Yeah. When do we want to try to go make the first inquiries?” he asked, and Stiles glanced at Sharron.

“I would go ahead and do it as fast as you can,” she urged. “I have the address. I think they open at nine in the morning,” she said, reaching into her bag to pull out a piece of paper to hand to Stiles.

Stiles took it and looked at Derek. “What do you think?” he asked softly.

Derek squeezed his fingers. “We can’t tomorrow morning, but I think Isaac can handle the shoots for tomorrow afternoon,” he suggested and Stiles smiled nervously.

“Then let’s do it.”

~

After making their desire to adopt known and making an appointment to meet with a family liaison, Stiles and Derek had to go back to work for a few hours. When Stiles got a call to come up to Talia’s office, he went without hesitation, suspecting she wanted to know how their day had gone. However, when he got to her office, Chris was there, too. 

“Stiles, we wanted to talk to you,” Talia said, and Chris gestured to the chair beside him, both of them across from Talia’s desk.

Stiles smiled in polite confusion. “About what?” he asked.

Talia put her hands together, looking down at something on her desk. “Derek texted me. Said you guys set up an appointment for Monday morning to start the process of all the checks, right?” she asked, and Stiles nodded. “Well… now that the wheels are in motion, I spoke to Chris and we had a bit of a proposition,” she said, glancing to Chris.

Chris nodded, shuffling the papers in his hands. “Stiles, you originally applied for an internship in my department, right? You wanted to be a writer.”

Stiles nodded. “I wanted to do some web content, not staff writing, but writing all the same.” He looked at Talia. “What’s this about?” he asked.

“I’ve decided to get back into the world of politics, campaigning for equality again,” she explained. “And Chris suggested that your case would be a great way to gain the kind of attention I need since I haven’t been very outspoken the last couple of years.” She smiled sadly. “I guess I got complacent. I had a comfortable position for those in my pack. Nobody was being discriminated against and I got used to that.” She shook her head. “You and Derek are a perfect example of things still being wrong in the world.”

Stiles nodded. “Yeah, we are… but what does my original application have to do with that?”

Chris’s silvery blue eyes turned to Stiles, holding out a page from his stack of papers. “Your marriage to Derek hasn’t been the news it could’ve been, considering how well known Talia is. After Peter’s ‘brush’ with the law a few years ago and Derek’s first wife, we’ve worked to keep the family out of the spotlight. The public doesn’t know much about Derek’s life, or yours because of that.” He nodded to the page. “However, our numbers for the issue with the you and Alex on the cover were a good deal above average. You weren’t at all in the article, but people saw the face of a young human man and his obvious bond with his cub. The reactions we got were full of words like ‘protectiveness’ and ‘a good father’.” He nodded to the numbers. “If the public knew that the man and cub on that cover were the grandchild and son-in-law of Talia Hale, it would get a little attention.” He looked to Talia, who nodded at him. He turned back to Stiles, face serious. “If they knew that the fiercely protective father on their favorite cover was being discriminated against in his attempts to adopt another child, it would create a buzz. It would drum up attention. Talia could use that kind of information and reaction to get attention for the cause for equality.”

Talia nodded. “Not to mention, it would sell really well,” she added. “What we want is for you to start writing monthly updates to your story. We can publish it all at the end of the process. Allow our readers to follow along with your and Derek’s journey. Make them form an emotional interest in the outcome of your attempts to adopt. Help create a dialogue between readers so that others outside of our readership can learn about the discrimination you’re facing. The circulation numbers would be high and the attention would go farther than even that.”

Stiles stared for a moment after she finished, then looked at Chris. “Wait.” He looked at the circulation specs in his hand and then turned a shocked and somewhat disbelieving face to Talia. “Are you saying you want to _profit_ off of Derek and me fighting to get a child?!” he asked suddenly.

Talia’s face was as calm as ever as she shook her head. “No, Stiles. I want to use this as a way to get the word out that this discrimination exists. You didn’t even know about it, Stiles. Most people don’t _know_ this kind of thing is illegal.” She held up a hand. “Yes, there is profit involved, but there’s always profit involved in this magazine. We never sell at a loss. Our desire is for a wider audience so that the word can get out there.”

Chris nodded. “Exactly. The readers could easily form an emotional investment in the story ending in you and Derek adopting. People could read your month-by-month updates like a journal when it’s published. It would drum up all sorts of questions and outrage about this ‘no interspecies adoption’ policy. It could help you in the future if you adopt again, or other couples wishing to adopt.”

Stiles swallowed, looking between them. “You want me to write a really large piece?” he asked.

“If you don’t think you can write it well, I have plenty of writers who can help,” Chris comforted. “But you can put emotions into it that no outside writer can. We thought about asking if we could have an article written on the situation, but we figure this would get the most raw emotion, which is what we need.”

“Our pack secrets won’t stay secret long, Stiles,” Talia said softly. “The adoption will involve divulging secrets to counsellors who must then divulge the pertinent information to the alphas I’ll have to appeal to. They will tell them things and someone is going to slip and talk about Peter or Derek or some other skeleton from somebody’s closet. This will help counter that and draw attention back to the problem, not pointless rumor-mill gossip.”

Stiles chewed on his thumbnail, looking at Talia nervously. “I need to talk to Derek about it,” he said hesitantly. “I’m interested. I- I do want people to know what it’s like. I want people to know how it feels to be told ‘your husband isn’t allowed to have a human child’ because he’s ‘dangerous’. I want people to understand what it’s like to feel this way,” he said softly, voice tight. “But this is my family. I’d have to talk about virtually everything and Derek is a very withdrawn person. He may not go for it,” he said.

Talia raised an eyebrow. “You don’t have to answer to him, Stiles. I know how he is, and I know he’ll probably say no, but that’s the thing about Derek. He’s as stubborn as he was as a little boy. I still had to make him eat his vegetables, though. What he needs isn’t always what he wants, and no, you can’t tell him what to do, but he can’t stop you from doing what you think is best either.”

Stiles shot her a flat look. “Talia, I mean this the nicest way possible, but I’m pretty sure leaving your husband out of a decision that involves him isn’t the right thing. You’re his mother, you may have had to make decisions about him without his consent or his input because of that, but I’m his husband, and I’m not forcing him to accept shit,” he said frankly, earning a raised eyebrow. “If Derek doesn’t want me to do this, it’s not me answering to him, it’s me respecting his decision.” He stood up, shrugging. “Derek doesn’t control me, but that goes both ways. I don’t know how things worked with your marriage, since you’re an alpha werewolf, but in _my_ marriage, everything is equal, and Derek gets a say in decisions that involve both of us and our cub.”

Stiles was at the door when he heard Chris chuckle, and as he was walking out, tell Talia, “He’s even more protective of Derek than Peter is of me, standing up to Derek’s own mother.”

Stiles didn’t hear Talia’s reply, but he had to blush when he realized he _had_ just nearly-insulted their alpha because she suggested Derek didn’t have any real say in the matter.

When he got home, since Derek had left while he was meeting with Talia and Chris, Derek was laid on the couch, flipping channels while Alex ran up and down the hall, making a toy dragon ‘fly’. Stiles smiled at Alex as he walked over to the couch before turning to look down at Derek. “Hey, what’d she wa-oof!” Derek grunted when Stiles, instead of sitting somewhere else, flopped down on top of Derek, resting his weight along Derek’s body. “Well thanks for the warming,” Derek grumbled, curling his arms around Stiles loosely, putting the remote on the floor. Stiles smiled mischievously and wiggled, elbow digging into Derek’s side just enough to make him glare. Stiles leaned down and pecked Derek’s lips, then he pulled back. “Hi?” Derek said, and Stiles sighed.

“Hey, Honey. Long day,” he said, flopping his head down onto Derek’s shoulder. “I think I kinda insulted your mom,” he said, and Derek tensed, pulling Stiles back by the back of his shirt collar to look at him.

“You insulted my mom? Why? You guys love each other,” he said in confusion.

Stiles propped himself up on the forearms that were resting against Derek’s chest, looking down at him. “I kinda got over protective of you,” he admitted sheepishly. “She and Chris had a proposition for me, and I said I needed to talk it over with you first, and they seemed to expect me to answer right away and she was kinda confused and said something about how you don’t get to control my decisions, and I know now she didn’t mean it the way it sounded, but I kinda got a little heated up at the insinuation that I should make big decisions that impact my family without consulting my husband.”

Derek smiled up at him suddenly. “Protective Stiles’s claws came out, huh?” he asked knowingly, sliding his hands up Stiles’s sides soothingly. 

Stiles rolled his eyes, batting at his chest absently. “Oh fuck off, I can’t help I’m protective of my mate,” he said, leaning down to kiss Derek sweetly. “I love you. Even if she’s your mom and obviously didn’t mean to suggest anything even slightly bad about her ‘baby boy’, I reacted as if she had insinuated that your opinion didn’t matter.”

Derek curled his arms around Stiles, hugging him flush, pecking his lips when Stiles slid his fingers into Derek’s hair. “What was so big that got all this going?” 

Stiles laid his head on Derek’s’ shoulder and stroked at his hair soothingly. “They want me to write about our struggles to adopt,” he said and Derek raised an eyebrow. “Your mom wants to get back into the fight for equality and our story would cause a dialogue between readers and others. If I wrote a monthly ‘update’ to our journey, the readers could read it all when it’s published and form an emotional bond. It would cause people to be outraged by the discrimination we’re facing. However, in order to do that, I’d have to be very open in my writing,” he said softly. He looked up to meet Derek’s eyes. “Our story would be pretty much out there. Our privacy would be a little less private. I would have to talk about Alex and at least a brief mention of where he came from. Some really painful things might have to be put out there for strangers to devour,” he whispered. “It affects you and Alex just as much as it does me.”

Derek hummed softly. “What do you think?” he asked softly, fingers skating along Stiles’s hip. “Do you want to?”

Stiles bit his lip, but nodded. “I want the world to know what this feels like. Discrimination hurts and very rarely do you get to have an insider’s perspective on it if you aren’t discriminated against. I cared about werewolf equality a long time before I met you, Derek, I always had a personal connection between Scott and my mom’s murder, but I never personally faced the discrimination before being told I would have to jump through even worse hoops than normal to get a child just because I fell in love with a werewolf.” He closed his eyes. “But this is our family getting splayed across the pages of a magazine and further, so it matters what you think.”

Derek sighed, resting his lips against Stiles’s temple. “I hate the idea of my past painted across the media,” he admitted. “My mother worked hard to keep my ‘missing years’ out of the media.” Stiles nodded. “But… this is big. If my mom is getting involved that heavily, and if you are the face people put to this movement it could make real impact. It could mean so much to so many people if we could change things.”

Stiles nodded. “Fucks sake, I hope it doesn’t happen, but if something happened to Isaac, Scott would never get to adopt a cub. Never. Scott isn’t quite as invested as I was, but he does want kids one day, you know?” he said. “He has a shot with Isaac, since Isaac’s one of us, but that’s his _only_ way. Scott couldn’t afford a surrogate, so if something happened to Isaac, Scott would have to marry a woman who can bear children in order to have one.” He shook his head. “Think how many people are like that? How many packless wolves, and rarer creatures like Kira being a Kitsune. It has to change,” he whispered. “It has to, Derek. It’s- it’s cruel. So many people who can’t adopt children even if they would fit into the foster-to-adopt program. And so many human children that can’t be adopted by families who are interspecies. Children that are wanted, children that someone would _die_ to have, and they’re stuck in the system because one of the parents isn’t human.”

“We can try to change it,” Derek said softly, stroking at Stiles’s back. “If you write this and my mom gets involved, change can happen. Your mom and my mom helped end segregated schools. My mom helped end violence against weres and get us equal rights when she was just a teenager. If anybody can change things, it’s her.”

Stiles sighed. “Yeah. And- and I can help. I may not be my mother, but I’m a parent and I want a future where my son and whatever other children we may possibly have some day don’t ever know what this feels like. If Alex ever wants to adopt one day, I don’t want him to ever feel this way.”

Derek’s breath caught and Stiles felt him jerk slightly. “Shit, no,” he agreed quickly. “God, Stiles, when she told you on the phone that I was the reason we can’t adopt a human I wanted to curl up in a ball and just cry,” he admitted weakly. “I love you with everything in my heart, and here I was, finding out _I_ am the reason you can’t have a human child. Knowing that it was my fault that the man I love was suffering so much grief was the worst I’ve ever felt.” He snorted. “I _murdered_ someone, I _saw_ my dad, aunt, and brother and sister get blown up, and yet none of it hurt as much as the sudden realization that I was at fault for something that could break your heart. If we can’t get a cub, then I’ll have to live forever knowing that your heart is broken because of me-“

“Derek, hush,” Stiles interrupted. “It is _not_ your fault-“

“But it feels like it,” Derek argued softly. “I know you wouldn’t divorce me over it, no matter how much it hurts, so you would end up growing old without ever getting more than our one cub and it would steal a piece of you forever and I’d live our whole life together thinking that if I had just- just let you go, let you meet a human instead, you could’ve had all the children you wanted.” Derek swallowed hard, eyes a little glassy. “You chose me and if this doesn’t work, I’d be the worst mistake you ever made.”

Stiles bit his lip, shaking his head. “No,” he choked out, eyes burning and throat tight. “Derek, you will never be a mistake. Never. I swear to God, I will never regret you, okay?” He kissed him sweetly. “And we’re going to do this, yeah? I’m gonna write this column, we’re going to work with your mom, we’re going to get everything going so that this bullshit ends, and in the middle of all of that, we’re going to adopt a cub because we both want this and I get what my family needs,” Stiles growled slightly. “I will make this happen no matter what, because everybody deserves the same freedom from discrimination and you and I deserve to have however many children we want, because we’re good parents and we have every means possible to provide a wonderful life for kids that need someone.” He sniffled. “So I’m gonna write for your mother and we’ll work this all out so you _never_ feel guilty like that again, okay?”

Derek reached up and swiped a tear off Stiles’s cheek. “Definitely okay.”

Stiles laughed wetly and leaned in to peck his lips. “Good.”

~

Stiles sat on the deck beside Peter, watching Derek and Chris work on building a tree house while Alex ‘helped’ by carrying around tools for them. He couldn’t help the stupidly warm feeling in his belly as he watched Derek laughing at something Chris said. “He’s still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen,” Stiles whispered to himself.

Peter chuckled, making Stiles blush when he realized he’d said it loud enough for him to hear. “Why Stiles, stop checking out my husband,” he joked and Stiles wiggled his eyebrows.

“Hey, Chris is a handsome man,” he drawled. “But a little old for me,” he said in a smaller voice. 

Peter smiled knowingly. “Oh yours isn’t so bad,” he said, making a face. “Really doubt we see the same thing, what with blood relation happening there, but objectively, Derek is kind of ridiculously good looking.” He sniffled and tilted his chin up. “Shockingly good looks run in the Hale genes,” he purred and Stiles grinned.

“Oh nobody misses that. You all have those cheekbones, that jawline, and that dark, thick hair. Every one of you looks like Talia just put her face on a photocopier,” he said with a chuckle. Stiles leaned back some, smiling at the ones out in the yard. “I know I’d have fallen for him even without his good looks, but I got damn lucky in the ‘gorgeous husband’ department.”

Peter snorted. “Such a shame, he let such good looks go to waste. Never dating, never flirting, always turning funny colors when somebody flirted with him.” He shook his head solemnly. “The boy is lucky you showed up or he’d have died alone someday.”

Stiles smirked. “I’m not complaining. I’m lucky nobody snatched him up before I got to. Do you know how many losers I dated before your nephew? Assholes and liars and the occasional good one that just didn’t want the things I did out of life. And look at me now.” He smiled a little bit smugly. “Married to the most handsome, most honest, most kind, and best man I’ve ever met. I’m so fuckin’ lucky.”

Peter chuckled. “Yeah, yeah, wait until you’ve been married longer than a couple months to start calling yourself lucky,” he teased.

Stiles grinned. “Oh shut up, you joke, but you’re just as stupid over yours as I am over mine,” he teased. 

“Mine isn’t as helpless as yours,” Peter countered with a smirk. “Just watch it. Another two years and Derek’ll be fat and lazy.”

“Nah,” Stiles argued. “Cubs keep you on your toes.”

Peter hummed softly, looking at Stiles searchingly. “Speaking of, rumor has it your cub search has officially started.”

Stiles bit his lip and nodded. “Yeah. Our first formal meeting is tomorrow. I’ve already started my first entry for the piece.”

Peter made a disgusted sound. “I still can’t believe Talia’s making you do that,” he growled. “I get it, I do, I get wanting to make things better, God do I ever,” he said, but hesitated, looking over at Stiles. “But making you write your pain for the world to read? Put yourself out there across the glossy pages so people can see every cut bleed? It’s too much to ask anybody. I would’ve never asked that of you,” he said earnestly. 

“No,” Stiles said softly, shaking his head. “It’s not- It’s worth it,” he said in a sober tone, looking up to meet Peter’s eyes. “If I have to bleed before the world, I do it so that someday nobody else has to.”

Peter held his gaze for a while but nodded understandingly before turning with Stiles to look back out at their husbands and Alex.

~

_The World We Live In by Stiles Stilinski-Hale_

_There are certain dates that everyone remembers. Independence day. Christmas. 9/11. There are also dates that mean something to just those who are involved. Birthdays, anniversaries. For me, there are three dates that matter the most to me. September 6, 2007, the day my best friend was turned by a rogue alpha, forever cementing my presence in the world of supernaturals. November 12, 2008, the day my mother was murdered by hunters for her involvement in the creation of the PRC and her role in protecting my friend from hunters. August 3, 2023, the day I married the love of my life and officially became the parent of his cub from a previous marriage._

_There is also a date I will never forget: February 27, 2024, the day that I discovered that, in spite of all the forward momentum in my lifetime in the fight for equality between species, the fight that my mother gave her life for, the fight that my Alpha pretty much began, my husband and I hit a wall in our journey into adopting another child: only humans can adopt children of any species. Most of you don’t know me. You read the ‘written by’ and never heard my name before that moment. To you, Stiles Stilinski-Hale means absolutely nothing. But while my name is unfamiliar, my situation isn’t to some of you._

_I knew from a very early age that the one thing I wanted more than anything was to be a parent. My plan when I was seventeen was to go to college, get married, and have three or four children by thirty. I sit here now at twenty-nine newly married to Derek Hale, Alpha Talia Hale’s son, with only one child, and I only have him because my mate had a cub from a previous marriage when we met. Don’t get me wrong, Alex is my son just as much as he is Derek’s by now, and I love my son more than anything in this world. My family is the greatest gift I’ve ever been given and I am grateful every day that I can look at them and see my future. But that future for me and Derek looks so much more perfect with more children. Derek told me once before we were anything more than friends that he hated the thought of Alex being an only child after growing up with so many siblings, and as an only child, I can honestly say it wasn’t bad but I did get lonely sometimes. And after my mother died, I wanted a brother or sister more than ever. Derek and I were only married six months when we decided that we wanted to adopt our next child straight away. We did some research, got a lawyer to help us with the process, and it was at that point that we ran into an issue. That issue is that werewolves can’t adopt human children._

_The laws for adoption state that the only species that can adopt from another species is human. Meaning that, since I’m a human and my husband is a werewolf, we can only adopt werewolf cubs. Which may not sound too bad, and it isn’t. We will adopt a cub. But it’s still very discriminatory. Only werewolves from a strong pack can adopt a cub, so packless wolves can never adopt. Rarer species like my friend the kitsune could only adopt a kitsune, which is virtually never going to happen. Humans are considered a blank slate because we’re deemed ‘safe’. My mother-in-law Alpha Hale fought for equal rights for werewolves against this same type of discrimination long before I was born. Werewolves were considered too dangerous to even interact with humans. My mother helped from the Peoples’ Rights Coalition with the Hale pack because my best friend was considered too dangerous to go to school with me anymore just because he was a werewolf. People have fought hard for the rights that werewolves have today and we are at a point in time where werewolves are considered normal members of society._

_And yet werewolves are still considered too dangerous to adopt human children. The reason this matters, is that it’s very hard to adopt a werewolf cub. It’s not too much to ask, I realize and respect that the cub comes first and it has to have the best family possible. However, there are very few werewolf cubs up for adoption simply because werewolves are an extreme minority and werewolf instincts make giving up a cub you’re unable to provide for nearly impossible. The only time cubs are up for adoption, most often, is when they are orphans. I want to give a cub a home and a family, I really do, but there are still thousands of human children out there that need homes and families as well. There are supernatural beings that want to give those children a home and a family. I want to extend my family._

_I know that many of you probably didn’t know this was a problem that existed. Some of you probably still don’t understand really why this is a problem. A few of you may even think now that it isn’t that big of a deal._

_That’s the point of this. That is the point of my piece. That’s the point of me telling you all my story, because you will get fully detailed accounts of every single struggle my family is going to embark upon in our journey to bring another child into our lives. I can promise you that you won’t finish my story without knowing with great depth how hard werewolves have to fight to get a child. To end this first part of our journey, let me explain this in a way nobody can misunderstand._

_My husband, the bravest, strongest man and werewolf I know, looked at me with tears in his eyes and apologized for ruining my life. My mate suffers from crushing fear that since he’s a werewolf, I won’t get the family I dreamed of and guilt that he didn’t let me go so I could meet a human and marry them instead because he thinks I wouldn’t be suffering this kind of pain if I hadn’t met him. He told me to my face that he wishes I would divorce him sometimes just so that I could be happy. This has to stop. I can’t stand the thought that someone before us has felt this. I can’t stand the thought that someday my son might want to adopt and he will face this same discrimination. I will not let that happen. I will not let my son ever be in his father’s shoes, guilty for the way he was born because he thinks it’s ruining the life of someone he cares about._

_My name is Stiles Stilinski-Hale. My mother was Claudia Stilinski. My husband is Derek Hale. My Alpha is Talia Hale. Every one of us has suffered from anti-werewolf discrimination. My son, however, will grow up in a world where this is all something of the past. I will not stand by and let my child grow up in a world where he has doors shut in his face just because of his species._

_Is that the kind of world you want your children to grow up in?_

“Stiles, are you-“ Stiles looked up and Derek stopped, eyes wide as he saw the tears on Stiles’s cheeks. “Stiles, what’s wrong?” he asked in a soft, concerned tone as he walked over.

Stiles smiled and laughed, shaking his head as he wiped his eyes. “Oh I’m fine, Derek. I’m just fine.” He sniffled and finished filling in the information to send his first portion of the article to Chris for proofreading. 

“Then why are you crying?” Derek asked, walking closer.

Stiles sighed, looking up at him. “Emailing my first entry to Chris.” He closed his laptop and stood up. “Wanted it to be done before we do this today. Felt it was best to get the introductory part out of the way before I get a taste of what we’re getting into.”

Derek’s smile was full of pain when he pulled Stiles into his arms in the middle of the living room. “It’s gonna be okay, I know it,” he whispered softly against Stiles’s ear.

Stiles nodded with a heavy sigh, winding his arms around Derek’s shoulders. “I know. It’s just my emotional side. Don’t worry about me, okay?”

Derek smiled warmly, pulling back far enough to kiss Stiles sweetly. “I always worry about you.” He pulled away, sliding his hand into Stiles’s. “Come on. Time to go.”

~

When Stiles and Derek sat down in front of the family liaison’s desk, Derek’s hand was shaking where Stiles held it in his lap. Stiles stroked the inside of his wrist comfortingly, even if he was freaking out equally as bad. He wanted to be strong for Derek. When the woman sat down across from them, she smiled comfortingly.

“Good morning, I’m Sarah Strothers, but you can call me Sarah,” she said in a calm tone. She opened their file on her desk and took a glance.

Stiles smiled. “Good morning, Sarah. I’m Stiles, and this is my husband, Derek,” he introduced and Derek smiled and nodded.

“Well, I see we have all the paperwork in order to start the adoption search process,” she said, looking through some things. “So this morning what we’re going to do is go over some of the things we’ve found in the background checks, just to be sure things are correct and we understand fully everything on the records, and then as long as that’s all worked out, we can start scheduling counselling and interviews,” Sarah said, and Derek and Stiles both nodded. “Alright, so first off just to confirm the information here,” she said, looking at two files side by side. “Derek, your full name is Derek Justin Hale, you were born November 28, 1989 to Talia and Richard Hale?”

Derek nodded. “That’s correct.”

She nodded. “And Stiles, your full name is- is… uh.” She tilted her head and Stiles laughed.

“Yes, that’s probably correct. Even I can’t pronounce it,” he said, and she chuckled.

“Unpronounceable no-middle-name Stilinski-Hale, you were born April 26, 1995 to John and Claudia Stilinski?” she asked with a smile and Stiles nodded to confirm. 

“Yes, I think I’m going to start writing that on my letter heads, actually,” he said and Derek rolled his eyes at him affectionately. 

Sarah nodded. “Now, I’m going to ask some really personal things and I’m sorry about that, but you understand it’s necessary,” she said, and they both nodded. “Alright, our first concern is, obviously, that you have a biological son already,” she said, looking up at Derek. “You obviously notice that it’s really rare for a werewolf to have a child from before they married their mate.”

Derek nodded. “This is my second marriage. Alex was just over a year old when Stiles and I met.”

“Yes, and that has us a bit concerned,” she said. “It’s not really heard of that a werewolf remarries so soon after their first partner dies. It’s even a little rare among humans to remarry so soon, but definitely odd about werewolves. And then when the background check revealed that she didn’t die in an accident but was killed and you killed her, it threw up some red flags, as you could understand,” she said, and Derek nodded. “Could you just give your own account of what happened with your first marriage and a little more of your side of what the police reports say?”

Derek nodded and Stiles squeezed his hand supportively. “Well,” Derek started, clearing his throat. “I moved away from home, which I know is a little strange, and I went to the east coast. I met Jennifer and I’d never really been one to date, so I didn’t really notice how unusual the overwhelming feelings I had for her were. Within months of meeting her we got married and within months of that, we found out we were going to have a cub. When he was born it started to make me notice things strange about our whole relationship. I don’t know if it was the overwhelming bond a parent has with their cub or if I just realized what all-consuming love for another person felt like with him, but I realized it was very odd that our entire relationship happened so fast. Obviously, since I’m a werewolf and he is my first cub and we lived the whole opposite end of the country away from my pack, I didn’t leave him at all for weeks. The furthest I would go was the next room over, even.” He swallowed hard. “One day Jennifer convinced me to go out to get something from the store, but I hurried because I didn’t feel right leaving him. When I got home, she was- she was hurting him. She was trying to kill him.” He looked away. “She was using magic the whole time. She used magic to make me fall for her because she needed a werewolf cub with her blood for some horrible ritual. She was going to kill him, and I wish it could’ve ended differently, but I came home to find my son bleeding and she was hurting him and I sort of lost control and just… killed her,” he said softly. “I didn’t differentiate between her being my wife or a total stranger in my drive to protect my cub. It was like a blind rage where I blacked out and defended him.”

She nodded, making some notes. “So you haven’t had any other violent incidences? You’ve never attacked someone else? Just this one incident defending your cub?”

Derek bit his lip. “Once. I had one bad fight with my uncle. However, adult werewolves fighting within their own pack is a matter handled by the pack alpha, not law enforcement.”

“Can you detail that for me?” she asked.

Derek nodded. “It was just before I left for New York. When I was sixteen he and I were the only survivors from my pack of the Argent Bombing,” he said, and she nodded with a sympathetic look in her eyes. “I didn’t finish high school because of that, and for most of my twenties I was pretty withdrawn. I didn’t go out, I didn’t talk much… I was just pretty scarred from the PTSD, I guess. When I got my GED and decided to move away for college when I was twenty-seven, he accused me of running away from everything instead of joining the family business and just dealing with what happened to us. We had a big fight and I was so angry at him and I had been bottling up anger at what happened to us that I sort of unleashed on him. It wasn’t that bad except that I clawed up his forearm and he was bleeding faster than healing.” He shook his head. “But I never had violent situations before that or after my wife tried to murder our son.”

She nodded, making some more notes. “Now, obviously there are some other things to note about your family that I just want to touch on. I’ll go over the details more thoroughly with your alpha, but just give me a little to note,” she said and Derek nodded. “Your uncle had a situation just a few years ago where he killed a visiting beta. I’m seeing a pattern that we have a little concern for,” she said gently.

Derek’s jaw clenched but he nodded. “His situations was sort of like my own. A visiting alpha and two betas took an issue with my mother allowing humans into our pack, especially one of them being a former werewolf hunter.”

“Yes, about that,” she interrupted. “I’ll let you continue, but I have to ask, how often will this former hunter be around your children should you adopt a cub?” she asked, making a note.

Stiles frowned. “Pretty often. He lives at the pack house, he’s our coworker, and he’s married to Derek’s uncle. But none of us really think of him as a hunter, former or otherwise. That’s far in the past.”

Sarah smiled. “I understand, but it is an issue that will need to be discussed further with the alpha of the pack and probably the man in question as well. Other alphas might have some concerns with a cub being adopted into a pack that has a former hunter, however reformed, in their midst.” She wrote something and looked up. “I’m sorry, just a little note to take. Please continue, Derek.”

Derek swallowed, but nodded, fidgeting nervously. “Well, the beta my uncle killed attacked his mate and nearly killed him. My mother was on the verge of biting him to save him when the paramedics got there to stop the bleeding. My uncle, like me, was cleared of any charges surrounding the death on grounds of defending a human.”

Stiles bit his lip. “Is this going to be a big problem for us? This history of violence?” he asked uneasily.

Sarah hummed. “I don’t think so. There are some things that werewolves are judged differently on. Violence is a factor to be worried about, but the extreme cases here were both defending someone in the pack. This will more than likely show a level of protectiveness that looks good instead of a red flag. But that will be clarified on in counselling sessions,” she explained. “As will this note on you, Stiles,” she said, and Stiles stilled, trying to think of what she could mean. “It says that when you were fifteen you attempted suicide,” she said matter-of-factly, but Derek stilled at Stiles’s side.

Stiles’s heart skipped a beat and he swallowed hard. “How did that even come up?” he asked in a hoarse tone.

Sarah looked up, frowning. “It’s a background check-“

“But those records were sealed. Besides,” he started. “It- it wasn’t a suicide attempt. I know it was ruled one before my father had the records sealed – which shouldn’t be open to a background check – but it was an accident.”

“Oh?” Sarah asked, looking almost relieved. “Can you explain it for me?” she asked gently.

Stiles nodded, and he felt Derek’s eyes on him. “My mother was murdered, as you have to know from my record, and it was hard on me. I was on a lot of medications, both before her murder due to ADHD and after for anxiety, and my best friend was segregated from me because he was a werewolf and it was just before desegregation, and I had real problems sleeping. I was prescribed sleeping pills since only sedatives could make me sleep. However, even taking all my medications, sometimes I still had nightmares so bad I couldn’t sleep. One night when my dad was at work, my best friend was in tutoring, I was alone and I didn’t have anybody else I could call since my best friend’s mom was working, so I wasn’t able to get anybody to help me remember what all I had already taken that night. I hadn’t sleep in two days and I was pretty much hallucinating. I had no idea if I’d taken any of my medication or not. So I took a second dose of each thing… and then a third.” He flinched. “And then a fourth. I didn’t know for sure if I had taken them before or if I imagined it, and I needed sleep so bad, I wanted to go to sleep really badly, so I kept taking them when I wasn’t sure if I’d taken them yet.” He shrugged. “Four times my prescribed amount of ADHD, anxiety, and sleeping medication was a pretty serious overdose. My dad got home the next morning near dawn and I was lying on the kitchen floor where I’d passed out.” 

“So it wasn’t a suicide attempt?” she asked, and Stiles shook his head.

“No! I know the hospital ruled it one, and my dad told them I wasn’t trying to kill myself, and I told them I wasn’t, but it still looked like one so my dad had to have my medical records for that incident sealed because at the time I was considering child care in the future and he didn’t want a history of suicide attempts to interfere with any of my potential employment opportunities.” Stiles shrugged. “I haven’t even thought about that in a long time, Sarah.” He looked over at Derek, who looked terrified. “I never told you because I just never even thought about it. Past injuries never really come up in conversation, and I didn’t think of it as anything other than a household accident.”

Sarah made some notes. “So you have no history of suicidal depression? No mental health crisis information?”

Stiles shook his head. “Not other than anxiety problems after my mom was murdered. After that incident they took me off everything but the ADHD medication, it wasn’t long before desegregation so my best friend got to come back to school, I saw him more often, and things got better so I haven’t had any issues at all since.”

“Well,” Sarah said with a small smile. “That’s good. Mental health issues are big obstacles sometimes,” she said. “Now, let’s make some confirmations about your career histories and income regularities next.”

Stiles nodded and glanced at Derek, but he could see in Derek’s eyes that they would be talking about that later.

~

Stiles and Derek were both pretty much exhausted when they finally got to work. When they got into the elevator, Stiles leaned heavily against the bar, letting his head fall back. He finally spoke after a drive in silence. “So, anybody else feel like you just got paraded around naked for judgment?” he asked and Derek sighed, but walked over and pushed Stiles against the wall, pressing his face into the crook of Stiles’s neck, hands on either side of his waist flat against the wall behind him as he breathed in Stiles’s scent. 

“I hope that went okay,” Derek rumbled and Stiles nodded, closing his eyes and sliding his hands up Derek’s arms to rest on his shoulders. “Hey,” he muttered softly, pulling back to look at Stiles. “About that overdose… was it really an accident?” he asked, looking worried.

Stiles nodded. “Yeah, I promise.” He cupped Derek’s cheek. “If I had actually tried to kill myself, I’d have thought about a way to bring it up, Derek. You told me everything about getting hurt and about killing your wife. I wouldn’t have held back from you something like that.” He smiled sadly. “I was just… a very messed up boy.”

Derek groaned pulled Stiles into a tight hug, holding him as close as possible, face pressed into his neck. “Jesus, it scares me thinking I could’ve never known you, Stiles. Even on accident, that’s scary.”

Stiles turned and kissed his hair. “You’re telling me? It breaks my heart just to imagine if Jennifer had succeeded in killing Alex and you.” He slid his hand down Derek’s back sweetly. “I love you, Derek Hale,” he said, smiling. “You’re gonna be a great daddy. Again,” he added and Derek laughed, pulling back to give Stiles an amused grin.

“Yeah, well you’re gonna be a great daddy again too,” he said, pecking his lips as the elevator dinged at their floor. “Speaking of, I wanna go hug my cub. I feel like I’ve been run through the wringer.”

“You and me both,” Stiles said, rolling his eyes. He put his hand out when Derek stepped back in the elevator and the doors started shutting. “Hey, bring him to the studio for a minute? I wanna say hello to my little boy, too,” he said, and Derek nodded, giving Stiles a warm, loving look when Stiles stepped away from the doors and headed to the studio to start work while Derek went upstairs to retrieve Alex from where he’d stayed with Talia while they were busy. 

~

Derek saw Alex coloring on his mom’s office couch before he even got all the way through the door. He stopped just inside the door and smiled, watching him happily scribbling away. “Hard to believe he’s three already, isn’t it?” Talia asked softly and Derek looked up with a smile.

Alex looked up at his grandmother’s voice and looked back at the door, a giant smile spreading on his face when he saw Derek. “Daddy!” he said brightly and Derek walked over, picking him up. “Where’d you go, Daddy?” Alex asked, frowning as he looked at Derek’s face. “Nana was at home when I woke up, not you and Stiles.”

Derek gave him a nervous smile. “Remember how Stiles and I talked to you about getting a new brother or sister?” he asked, and Alex nodded. “We had to go talk to a lady about seeing if we can. We won’t know anything for a little while but we started talking to the people about it.”

Alex tilted his head. “Where’s Stiles?” he asked and Derek hitched him higher on his hip before turning to go to his mom’s desk. 

“He’s in the studio. You wanna go see him? He wanted me to bring you,” he said and Alex nodded, bouncing excitedly. Derek leaned over to kiss his mom’s cheek. “Thanks, Mom,” he said and she smiled warmly.

“It’s no trouble, you know that.” She gave him a pointed look. “Tell me more about how it went later, okay?” she asked and Derek nodded.

“I’ve got to get a certain little man down to see his other daddy. Stiles didn’t like not seeing him this morning,” he said with a grin as he turned and headed for the office doors.

When they got to the elevator, Alex wanted to get down so Derek let him. “Daddy, how do you get another baby? You and Stiles are both boys. Girls have babies,” he said, looking confused.

Derek chuckled in amusement. “That’s why we’re adopting a brother or sister for you. You find a baby or a little kid that needs parents and they come home to live with you and you become their parents.”

Alex frowned. “But why don’t they have a daddy already?”

Derek faltered some and knelt down. “Hey, can you hang onto that question until we get to Stiles?” he asked, reaching out to brush Alex’s curls back out of his face. “This is really something we should talk about with Stiles, too,” he explained.

Alex nodded, looking puzzled still. “Okay.” When the elevator doors dinged open Alex didn’t wait for Derek and ran flat out down the hall towards the studio. “STIIIILEEES!” he shouted as he ran towards the door. He stood on his toes and grabbed the door handle, then grunted as he tugged the heavy door open on his own and then ran into the studio.

By the time Derek caught up, Alex was sitting on the drafting table beside where Stiles was straightening up some folders. “I see a certain little cub didn’t wait for Daddy,” Stiles said, grinning up at Derek when he got to the table.

Alex kicked his feet as he poked at the pictures on the table. “Stiles, why is that man naked?” he asked, and Derek raised an eyebrow, leaning over, only to snort when he saw it was an article about werewolf actors and one of the men was in nothing but boxers as he lounged in a bathtub.

“Cause he’s taking a bath, obviously,” Stiles joked and Alex gave him a grumpy look.

“Nobody takes a bath in their underpants,” he said and Stiles wiggled his eyebrows.

“Hey, you never know. Don’t judge how people wanna take a bath, dude. When I was little I liked to take a bath wearing goggles and a snorkel,” he said and Alex laughed openly. Stiles leaned against the table, arms on either side of Alex. “So, did Daddy tell you that we had that meeting about trying to get you a brother or sister this morning?” Stiles asked and Alex nodded.

“But I don’t get it,” he said, frowning in confusion. “Why come the babies don’t already have a daddy or mommy?”

Stiles bit his lip, and Derek put a hand on his back, leaning against the table beside him and Alex. “I told Alex we should talk about it with you,” he explained softly. He gave Stiles a somewhat helpless minute shrug and Stiles nodded, giving Alex a sad smile.

“Well, sometimes… sometimes mommies or daddies aren’t really good at being a mommy or daddy,” he started. “Scott doesn’t have a daddy, you know?” he asked and Alex nodded. “Well, his daddy wasn’t very nice. He’s a very important man, but he just wasn’t a very nice daddy. He left when Scott was little and he doesn’t come around very often. Sometimes when mommies or daddies leave, they don’t come back.” He put his hand on Alex’s little knee. “But sometimes mommies or daddies …” He trailed off and gave Derek a worried look.

Derek sighed softly, looking at Alex. “You know how I don’t have a daddy?” he asked and Alex nodded. “Well, when I was younger, something really bad happened,” he tried to explain. “There was a bad… accident. My daddy, my aunt, and my brother and sister all died,” he said as gently as possible.

Alex’s eyes widened. “Your daddy _died_? Like the squirrel?” he asked, and Derek cringed, thinking about the squirrel that Alex had seen get hit by a car. It had been pretty terrible explaining death to a toddler, and Alex had spent weeks terrified everybody he knew was gonna drop dead any moment. He’d got past it, but Derek and Stiles had struggled with the situation. 

“Yeah, my daddy died,” Derek said, reaching out to brush a hand over Alex’s hair. “Sometimes a baby’s mommy and daddy die. And I had a big family left, and I was sixteen, so I wasn’t a little boy, but sometimes a baby doesn’t have any other family. There’s nobody to take care of them, so they need new parents to give them a family.”

Alex looked up with wide, sad eyes. “So my new brother or sister’s daddy died?” he asked in a tiny voice that broke Stiles’s heart.

“Yeah, probably,” he said gently. He leaned in and kissed Alex’s head. “But that’s why we’re going to get a new brother or sister for you, cause then they’ll have two daddies that love them very much and a brother that loves them very much and they won’t be alone anymore.” 

Derek nodded. “Are you still okay with having a new brother or sister?” Derek asked nervously, and Alex nodded, his bottom lip trembling slightly.

“I don’t want the new baby to not have daddies no more,” he whimpered, and Stiles made a pained little sound as he grabbed Alex up off the table, pulling him into his arms when he started crying.

“Oh it’s okay, Alex.” Stiles rocked him gently, shushing him. “Shhhh, it’s okay. Our new baby will have a big family, right? A lot of cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents. We’ll give him or her a big new family so they’re very happy, won’t we?” he asked, and Alex nodded, his face still pressed into Stiles’s neck.

Derek stepped closer and leaned into kiss Alex’s face – what was visible around his mess of hair and Stiles’s neck – and wrapped his arms around Stiles so that Alex was between them. “It’s gonna be okay, Alex. We’ll make sure the new baby knows we all love him or her very much.” He pulled back enough to see tears streaking Stiles’s face where he tried to hide them in Alex’s hair. He reached up and gently swiped his thumb under Stiles’s eyes, making him look up, his big, brown eyes full of sadness and hope. Derek gave him a meaningful look, holding his face in one hand. He didn’t have to speak for Stiles to know what he was trying to say.

_We’re going to get a cub and we’re going to give them a good life._

~

_Stripped Down And Torn Open by Stiles Stilinski-Hale_

_I know the same thing happens with human adoptions, but I have an announcement! Background checks and counselling suck. Just the first meeting to get our notes straight before the counselling started was like being paraded around naked and having every part of your life examined closely._

_The actual counselling was like what I imagine a cavity search from the TSA is like._

_The only two counselling sessions I’ve had so far were me and Derek and just me on my own, but both of them were incredibly deep. The psychiatrist, Mandy, asked me about everything from my childhood, to my mother’s involvement in protests for equal rights and how I felt about that, to the attack me and my best friend suffered when we were thirteen (the one that ended in him a werewolf and me scarred down my side), my mother’s murder, my father getting shot in the line of duty this one time, to the time I accidentally overdosed when I was fifteen (I hadn’t slept in two days and took more than one dose of my medication because I couldn’t remember if I’d taken it yet), all the way to my life now with Derek and Alex._

_The couple session was really invasive. She asked me and Derek to list things we hate about each other and discuss them. She asked us to describe our future together, she wanted to know what we thought of each other when we met, she wanted us to just full on start arguing it seemed. Derek says he thinks she wanted to see how hard it would be to make us turn on each other as a look at how likely it was we would stay married, but I don’t understand that, really. We’re mates. He’s a werewolf and I’m his mate. Our mate bond is so strong even Alex can feel the parental bond to little ‘ol human me. Werewolf mates don’t divorce very often. That’s the reason werewolves tend to date around until they find the one person they have that bond with. She even went as far as to ask us details about what goes on in the bedroom, she was so thoroughly invasive._

_I know that she’s also handled the counselling sessions with Alpha Hale and my father and soon-to-be-stepmother. Mandy doesn’t cover the interviews the other’s had, but our family liaison managed to make my best friend cry in his interview._

_Granted, my best friend cries all the time, so that’s not that hard to do._

Stiles was interrupted by the door to the studio slamming open. He looked up and Peter stalked in, glaring. “What’s up?” he asked, saving his first draft for his second article. 

Peter waved a hand. “Where is my nephew, I’ve got to bitch to him about that damn interview cause it’s his fault.”

Stiles raised an eyebrow. “How is it his fault?” he asked and Peter scoffed.

“For being bisexual. If his mate had been a girl he could’ve just knocked her up and I wouldn’t be dealing with this crap,” he said and Stiles laughed.

“Awww that bad?” he asked and Peter glared.

“I had to talk about my husband’s past as a werewolf killer and then Chris had to practically swear he never feels like hurting his pack members,” he grumbled. “My God, I almost expected to have to consent to a body cavity search.” 

Stiles nodded. “I know what you mean.” He flapped a hand. “You had an interview, we had that AND we’ve had counselling sessions! She asked me how often we have sex!” he stressed.

Peter gave him a dramatically shocked look. “Wait, you actually have sex?” Stiles glared. “No really,” Peter said, smirking. “You two are like the most G-rated couple ever. I think your wedding was the first time I saw you kiss-“

“Oh shut up, it is not,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Not everybody has to advertise their sex life, Peter,” he pointed out. 

Peter shrugged, winking at him. “So. How often _do_ you have sex?” 

“None of your business,” Stiles said with finality.

Peter leered. “Derek clearly can have sex, Alex exists, so _do_ you guys have sex?”

“We’re married, what the hell do you think?” Stiles asked with a shake of his head. 

“Hey, there’s no telling! Derek was a virgin until he was like twenty-five! I wasn’t sure he didn’t have a defective dick!” Peter said and Stiles snorted, grinning in spite of himself.

“Oh God, defective dick, wow,” Stiles said, and Peter shrugged. “No, trust me, my husband does not have a defective dick,” Stiles said, snickering.

Peter sighed with a smug look on his face. “It’s so sad that you two are so young and healthy and my fifty year old husband gets laid more than you do,” he mocked and Stiles gave him a wicked little grin.

“You sure about that?” he asked, and Peter laughed in surprise. Stiles’s smile grew sheepish. “Nah, you probably do, man,” he said with a shrug. “Having a three year old is exhausting, sadly.”

Peter nodded. “And this is why I’m glad I married an older man,” he said sagely. “No kids to deal with, and he’s old enough he can last a loooong time in bed but not so old he doesn’t want sex anymore. It’s perfect.”

Stiles laughed. “Yeah well, another ten years and you’ll still be young enough to want sex a lot but he’ll be so old it’s not really in the cards, so enjoy it while you can,” he teased and Peter rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re old, whatever.” He smirked. “You’ll wish you looked as good as I do when you’re my age.”

“Do I hear you comparing yourself to my mate?” Stiles smiled and looked up when Derek came out of the wardrobe and makeup department door. Derek raised an eyebrow at Peter. “Doesn’t it hurt your vanity to picture how gorgeous Stiles will be when he’s forty when you’re all old and gray-“

“I do not have gray hair-“

“You dye it, don’t lie,” Derek argued, sliding up beside Stiles at the table. “I’ll have so many wrinkles when I’m forty and Stiles will be just as beautiful as ever,” he said and Stiles gave him a grin.

“Flattery will get you everywhere, Hale,” he said, bumping their shoulders together.

Peter rolled his eyes. “Bitch please, you’re ugly now,” he said, then pointed at him. “I came here to bitch to your other half because I felt like I just got mentally violated in that fucking interview and Chris had to outline all the ways he doesn’t want to actually murder us all every day, so thanks for that.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Oh please, you want me to be able to have another cub, you just want to bitch to somebody,” he accused.

“Mentally violated,” he reiterated, but didn’t deny the accusation as he turned on his heel and pranced – there really was no other word for whatever the hell he was doing – out of the studio without a backwards glance.

Stiles snorted, shaking his head. “Your uncle is nuts,” he said and Derek chuckled, but squeezed Stiles’s hand affectionately instead of answering as he walked off to get his camera so that they could be ready for the shoot they were about to do.

~

_Disheartened by Stiles Stilinski-Hale_

_Today we had our first meeting with a prospective cub. We were approved to adopt, our pack was found safe for us to adopt into, and we have to meet a cub we click with before the alphas can meet with Talia, so that is a hurdle for later on. As I said, we met our first prospective cub and let’s just say it did not go well._

_His name was Adam, he is a four year old cub from Southern California, and they thought he may be a good match for us. However, the minute he saw Derek, he entirely freaked out. He started yelling and crying and seemed terrified of him. They let me hold him, saying that it wasn’t abnormal for cubs to panic meeting new werewolves, but when I held him, he kicked me and started trying to bite me. We don’t know what happened, but he just screamed and screamed for the woman who cared for him to help him and after it became clear he wasn’t going to calm down, we had to give him back to her and she left. They asked if we wanted to try again, and we said yes, because we both understood why he may be afraid, but hoped he might calm down._

_The second time was worse. He fought me so hard he fell over and hit his head. I felt like the worst person in the world for losing my grip and letting him get hurt. After that, we had to accept that even if we wanted him, he did not want us._

_Derek seemed so dejected on the way home._

Stiles didn’t expect anybody else to be up as he sat at the kitchen table in the Hale house, but he heard a shuffling and looked up. He raised an amused eyebrow when it turned out to be a shirtless Scott. “Somebody looks like they were having fun tonight,” he said softly, wiggling his eyebrows. He and Derek had decided to stay the night when they got back to pick up Alex instead of go home. Derek was upset and Stiles suggested staying at the pack house because he thought that sleeping in his old room, surrounded by the sounds and scents of his pack, would make him feel better for the night. Alex was a little grumpy about sleeping in his old baby bed since they had graduated him to a big boy bed at home, but Derek nor Stiles wanted him as far away as the couch downstairs in their dark moods.

Scott gave him a ‘deer in the headlights’ look, then blushed and ducked his head, crossing his arms over his chest. Stiles could see red patches on his chest and his hair was standing on end. “What’re you doing here? And up?” Scott asked softly as he walked to the refrigerator and got a bottle of water.

Stiles sighed heavily, looking at the blinking cursor on his laptop. “Writing about today.” He looked up. “You must’ve got here after everybody else went to bed, but it didn’t go well today,” he said.

Scott’s eyes widened in sympathy and he walked over quickly. “Aw no, what happened?” he asked, sitting down beside Stiles.

Stiles sniffled some, looking up with tears shining unshed in his eyes. “The kid we were meeting was terrified of Derek. He freaked out entirely. He tried to bite me and hurt me to get away from being in the chair beside Derek.” He shook his head, chuckled humorlessly. “Derek was so guilty. Again. We drove home and the whole way he had that look on his face, that same look he had when we learned we couldn’t adopt a human. He looked so dejected and guilty and it kills me, Scott,” he gasped, looking up. “It kills me when I know he feels that way because it’s not his fault. I keep telling him it’s not, but he just- he feels so bad and I don’t want him to feel like he’s failing me.”

Scott grabbed Stiles and pulled him into a hug. “It’s okay, dude.” Scott said, and Stiles let out a choked sound, pressing his face into Scott’s bare shoulder. “Stiles, it’s gonna work out. This first one didn’t work, but maybe the next time it’ll go great? And Derek just- he just really loves you, dude. He wants you to be happy, and I know you are no matter what, and I know you hate him feeling that way, but he’s a kinda insecure guy. He can’t help it. But it’ll be fine, you know? Just give it some time, cause in the end it’ll work out and it will be worth it.”

Stiles sniffled, moving until his chin was on Scott’s shoulder and his arms were more loose around his neck. “I love you, dude. This is why I picked you to be my best friend in third grade.”

Scott giggled some. “Sure it wasn’t me sharing the pink crayon?” he asked and Stiles laughed wetly.

“Well that helped, everybody knows pandas have to be pink,” he said, lip quivering some as he turned his head into Scott’s neck. “Scott, it’s gonna be okay, right? Lie to me if you have to, but just tell me it’s gonna be okay.”

Scott made a strained sound and squeezed him tight. “It’s going to be great, dude. Just you watch. You’re gonna have like a dozen kids ten years from now, just you wait.” He rubbed Stiles’s back. “You’ve always got this pack, and you’ve always got me, and you’ve always got our parents, and you’ve always got your husband and cub. It can only get better from here, okay? It’s gonna get better.”

Stiles nodded, but kept his mouth shut, afraid he wouldn’t be able to speak without crying again.

~

Scott had gone to bed while Stiles stayed downstairs, trying to finish writing since he couldn’t sleep, when Stiles heard the patter of little feet coming down the hall. He immediately looked to the doorway, frowning when Alex came walking in, rubbing his eyes and hugging his stuffed pig, Mr. Pig (Alex wasn’t the most creative child, but it was adorable either way). “Alex? Why aren’t you asleep?” Stiles asked when Alex came over to him and immediately crawled into Stiles’s lap.

“Where’d you go?” Alex mumbled, pouting as he leaned into Stiles’s chest. “I woked up and you and Daddy was gone.”

Stiles hesitated as he rubbed Alex’s back. “Wait, Daddy wasn’t in bed?” he asked. Alex shook his head, snuggling against Stiles’s neck with a tiny, adorable wolfy grumble. Stiles smiled and closed his eyes, kissing Alex’s hair as he shut the laptop and stood up. He walked back upstairs, carrying Alex up and down the hall until he fell asleep again. He walked back to Derek’s room and laid Alex on the bed that was devoid of Derek still and stepped back out, walking down the hall to see if Derek was anywhere in one of the rooms not being used as bedrooms. 

It wasn’t until he got to the end of the hall that he noticed that Talia’s door was open by about six inches and there was a faint humming coming from in there. He frowned, wondering why Talia was awake, and walked to the door. He started to knock, but as he peeked through the gap, the sight he saw made his heart stutter. He couldn’t even name all the emotions crashing over him as he edged the door open just a few more inches so that Talia would see him there and not be startled. She looked up and smiled, but didn’t stop humming as she stroked her fingers through Derek’s hair. Stiles put a hand to his mouth as he leaned against the door casing, watching as his husband laid curled up with his head on his mom’s lap, sleeping as she sat against her pillows and hummed to him. 

The fact that his thirty-five year old husband felt the need to crawl in bed with his mother to help fight away the pain he was feeling absolutely crushed Stiles. The fact that Talia had simply let Derek curl up in her lap like a scared child without a second thought made Stiles feel so much respect for how much Talia Hale loved her children. The fact he hadn’t been there to comfort Derek before he went to his mother made Stiles feel a little bit like a failure.

The fact that for a small moment Stiles was painfully jealous over the fact that Derek was able to curl up in his mother’s lap when Stiles hadn’t been able to do the same for a long, long time made him feel a mixture of sadness, pain over how much he missed his mother, and a little guilt at his envy. 

Stiles smiled at Talia and slowly backed out, pulling the door shut behind him. He went back to Derek’s room and crawled into the bed with Alex. Alex mumbled something and flopped over to snuggle into Stiles’s chest. Stiles pulled the covers over them and curled his arms around Alex, holding him close enough he could feel Alex’s heartbeat against his own chest and through the hand on Alex’s back. He pressed a kiss to Alex’s hair and smiled to himself as he realized he was lucky enough to have Alex. He had faith that he and Derek would be able to adopt another child, but no matter what, Alex was his cub and he was lucky for that, because nothing could take being a parent away from him. He and Derek were parents, and that was something he would always have. The number of children didn’t determine whether or not he was a parent. 

“I love you, Alex,” he whispered against his little head. “No matter what, you’re my baby boy. Even when you’re all grown up like me and Daddy, you’ll still be my baby boy the way Daddy is still Nana’s baby boy,” he said fondly. 

He fell asleep with Alex in his arms, love in his heart for the family he had now, and hope for the future. 

~

Alex kept giggling into his hand as he and Stiles pretended to be spies on the way to Stiles and Derek’s bedroom, a glass in Alex’s hand and a plate in Stiles’s. Stiles made a show of checking to see if the coast was clear and then making nonsense hand gestures and pointing into the bedroom. Alex nodded seriously and ran down the hall, juice almost sloshing out, before ducking into the bedroom. Stiles followed him and grabbed the glass just before Alex got a running start and leapt onto the bed, jumping around. “DAAAADDY!” he cried, jumping on the bed beside Derek. “Daddy Daddy Daddy Daddy!” he cheered before flopping down on top of Derek finally, poking his face.

Derek groaned tiredly and pushed Alex away some, rolling onto his back with a sleepy frown as he looked up at the child sitting on his middle. “Wuhh?” he grumbled, rubbing at his eyes.

Stiles set the plate and glass on the bedside table and crawled onto the bed to flop half on top of Derek as well. “Wake up, Daddy,” he said, kissing his scruffy cheek. “Wake up, wake up, wake up!”

“Mrahhh why?” Derek whined sleepily and Stiles beamed.

“Because, Dum Dum, me and Alex have a surprise for you!” He sat up and tugged at Derek’s hands until he sat up, huffing as he settled against the headboard, pulling Alex off of his lap to sit beside him.

“Alright, alright, what is it?” he asked tiredly.

Stiles leaned in and pecked his lips. “Well, a certain little boy helped me make breakfast for Daddy,” he said, and Derek turned a soft, sleepy smile at Alex. 

“You did?” he asked, ruffling Alex’s hair.

Stiles caught Derek’s eye when he looked back and returned the warm, happy look in Derek’s eyes. “Happy anniversary, Derek,” he said, reaching out to squeeze Derek’s hand.

Derek grinned and pulled Stiles’s hand to his lips, kissing his palm. “Happy anniversary, Stiles.” He sat up some more and scrubbed at his hair. “Alright, alright, I’m awake now.” 

Stiles laughed. “Good.” He grabbed the plate and held it out to Derek, who laughed when he saw a smiley face made of eggs and bacon. “Alex’s idea,” he said and Derek smirked playfully.

“Hey, with you and him, you can never tell who comes up with the ideas,” he teased, then leaned down to kiss Alex’s hair. “Thanks for helping Stiles with breakfast. It’s a really sweet thing to do,” he said and Alex bounced happily.

“And later you can give Stiles his present, Daddy!” Alex said excitedly. “He got you a-“ Derek put his hand over Alex’s mouth and gave him a glare. Stiles just smirked.

“Ahhh, did Daddy get me a present?” he asked, narrowing his eyes at Derek. “I thought we agreed no presents, you. Tell me you didn’t spend unnecessary money on me.”

Derek gave him an innocent look. “I have no idea what he’s talking about. He’s crazy,” he said and Alex rolled his eyes at his dad.

Stiles huffed but smiled. “Whatever you say,” he said, leaning in to give Derek a quick kiss. “I love you even if you are annoying,” he said, slotting himself into Derek’s side as he pulled Alex onto his lap. “Now share the bacon,” he demanded, opening his mouth expectantly.

Derek rolled his eyes, but held up a piece of bacon for Stiles to bite out of his hand and gave the other half of it to Alex, who settled against Stiles’s chest and chomped on the bacon. Derek curled his arm around them, settling back to enjoy breakfast in bed with his family.

~

It wasn’t until later at work that Derek came up to Stiles and offered him a flat package wrapped in plain blue paper. “Happy anniversary,” he said, sneaking a kiss before winking and walking over to start the photo shoot they had going. Stiles narrowed his eyes but opened the gift.

When he looked at the cover, his breath caught in his throat. He opened the scrap book with a photo of the three of them on the cover and inside the first photo was baby photos of Alex. Stiles had seen them, but only briefly. As he flipped pages, there were a few photos of Alex from before Stiles met him until suddenly he turned the page and there was a full-page devoted to the cover he had been on with Alex in his arms. The next photos were pictures he’d taken himself of Derek and Alex playing together or the occasional selfie with Alex. There were some holiday photos, including a photo of him and Derek the day Derek proposed to him. Then he found a full page of his and Derek’s wedding photos and one of the invitations to their wedding. There were pictures of the whole pack thrown in, but mostly just him, Derek, and Alex. 

When he got to the last page of photos only a third of the way into the book, there was a little label that said “Hale Family, Christmas 2024” and below it there were empty spaces labeled Derek, Stiles, Alex, and then, the part that made Stiles’s breath catch in his throat, a space left empty with a blank tag below it. Stiles put a hand over his mouth as he let out a wet laugh. Derek was confident enough that they would have their second child before Christmas that he had put it in the scrap book before it was even time. Stiles looked up, sniffling slightly, and his eyes locked on Derek, who was directing a shoot. He waited two seconds until Derek lowered the camera then slid from the table and all but ran over, throwing himself at Derek.

“Whoa! Stiles!” Derek cried in surprise, catching Stiles around the waist. “What- Mmmph!” Derek squeaked in alarm when Stiles kissed him agressively. Derek panted softly when Stiles finally broke the kiss. “What happened to professionalism-“

“Fuck it, I love you so much,” Stiles laughed, holding Derek’s face in his hands. “Oh Derek,” he breathed, looking into his eyes. “You- you ridiculous man, God, a year of being married to you and I still cannot believe you.” Derek’s eyes softened and he smiled.

“You’re one to talk,” he said softly, leaning in to nudge their foreheads together. “I take it you liked your present?”

“Ha!” Stiles rolled his eyes. “I’m about four breaths away from having my way with you, that’s how good of a present it was,” he said and Derek laughed in surprise.

“Stiles!”

“I’m serious!” Stiles argued playfully. “You being an awesome husband is definitely the sexiest thing ever. You’re sooo getting laid tonight after the cub is in bed,” he informed Derek and Derek blushed, giving Stiles a half-assed stern look as he nodded his head at Isaac and their model, who were both dying of laughter behind Stiles. 

“ _Stiles_ ,” Derek whined with embarrassment.

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Oh please, you’re my husband, I’m allowed to think you’re the sexiest thing out there. I signed a contract with the state of California and everything,” he joked, pulled Derek into another slow, slightly dirty kiss.

Derek laughed low in his throat when Stiles finally broke the kiss. “Mmmmm as your husband, I feel obligated to remind you that you were the one that said doing this at work was tacky.”

“Nope,” Stiles said, nuzzling into Derek’s jaw. “Only tacky when Peter does it.” He pulled away with a sigh and kissed Derek quickly. “Okay, really, I need to stop or I’m going to drag you into your office and break my office sex rule.”

Derek flushed again, groaning. “Stiles, I really need to work and now everybody is laughing-“

“Let ‘em, their husband isn’t the best father to ever exist, so they don’t know how sexy you are,” he purred, slapping Derek on the butt when he drew away suddenly, turning to head out the studio. “I’m gonna go show my present to people!” he called back, snagging the scrap book on the way out. 

Derek just shook his head and smiled as Stiles left before turning back to continue shooting.

~

Peter raised an eyebrow as he exited Talia’s office and found Stiles sitting on Erika’s desk while she cooed over something. “What the hell are you two acting like that over?” he asked and Stiles looked up with a smirk.

“Explaining to her why my husband is the best husband ever,” he said confidently. “Come see what he gave me for our Anniversary,” he said, pointing at the book on Erica’s desk.

Peter walked over and leaned in, only to raise an eyebrow. “A scrapbook? That’s what has you all excited?”

Stiles beamed. “A _family_ scrap book! Photos of him and Alex when Alex was a baby and then photos of me and Alex and all of us and the whole family at Alex’s birthday and Christmas, and then empty places for our next baby!” He bounced happily. “Derek is the perfect man. I swear to God, I’ll never stop wondering what I did in life to get this lucky.”

Peter shot him a flat look. “It’s a book, not a new car.”

Stiles narrowed his eyes. “I really give no shits what you think, I didn’t marry a sugar daddy,” he said and Peter laughed in surprise.

“Bitch!” he said and Stiles blew him a kiss. 

“Bitch with an awesome husband.” He laughed when Erica high-fived him.

Peter chuckled. “You keep your boring husband. For my last anniversary gift, I got a new Armani suit and roleplaying the good boy being corrupted by the bad boy thing.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Chris in ripped jeans and a leather jacket is so hot.”

Erica tilted her head and hummed. “Sounds hot,” she said with a nod. “Does Derek do sexy role playing games with you?” she asked Stiles, who mimed gagging.

“Ew, no.” He snorted. “I don’t want Derek to be anybody but himself any time. I’m happy with my sweet, loving husband being just that in bed.”

Erica huffed. “Ew, lame. I mean I’m not into roleplaying, but angry sex and wild ‘rip his clothes off’ sex are totally necessary.”

Peter smirked. “Damn straight.”

Stiles cringed. “I know all about that. I’ve seen Peter ripping Chris’s shirt off way more than I should have.” 

Peter just shrugged. “I’m not at all ashamed.”

~

Peter sighed, arching his back some before settling again against the lounge chair he was on. Stiles had decided to get some so that he could take naps in the sun on their deck, and Peter apparently felt the need to strip down to his boxers and lay out in the sun like an oversized cat when he saw it. “Remind me why we don’t have a deck at the Hale House, Christopher.” 

Chris chuckled and exchanged a look with Stiles, who was sitting on the rail beside him while they both basically ignored Peter. “Because we have a patio instead and, in case you forgot, werewolves don’t really tan, so there’s no reason for a lounge chair.”

Peter shrugged. “Fuck tanning, I just want to stay here warm forever,” he sighed, pushing his sunglasses back up from where they had slid down.

Derek came out the back door, glanced at Peter, then rolled his eyes as he brought Stiles a glass of water. “I’m going to laugh when he gets skin cancer,” he said and Chris gave him a chastising glance.

“Oh whatever, you could use some sun, Casper,” Peter said flippantly. “It’s weird looking, because your natural skin tone isn’t super white, yet you’re pale as a sheet on top of that natural tone, so you just look ill.”

Stiles huffed. “Hey, Derek does not look ill,” he defended, hooking his fingers through Derek’s. “He looks good pale. Goes nicely with his light eyes and dark hair.” 

Derek smiled smugly when Peter rolled his eyes at them. “Face it, you’re pale as hell, too,” he said, then leaned in to kiss Stiles quickly. “I’ve gotta go, I need to take those papers to Sharron. Can you watch Alex?”

“Of course,” Stiles said, squeezing his fingers. “I’ll be in to watch him in a minute.”

“Papers?” Peter asked after Derek walked off and Stiles nodded. 

“Yeah, we’re negotiating with a pack about a baby they have. They don’t want it but they aren’t happy with somebody who isn’t living with a pack having it.” Stiles crossed his fingers. “If they say yes to a meeting, we’ll get to at least meet the baby and see how it interacts with us. I’m not sure if it’s a boy or a girl, but it’s a baby and we’re not at all picky.” He held up a hand, making a face. “And really, the glare off your white ass chest is horrible, Peter,” he teased.

Chris smirked over at Peter and then nudged Stiles. “At least this time he remembered to take off his clothes,” he said and Stiles gave him an alarmed look.

Peter groaned. “No, Christopher-“

“Years ago, back before he even wanted me to know he didn’t hate me anymore,” Chris started and Peter huffed, glaring at him. Chris ignored him and continued. “Derek and I were painting the house and Peter claimed he was ‘getting a tan’ but realistically he was just lying out on the back patio to look at my ass in tight jeans. It was easy to tell since he was fully clothed,” he said with a mischievous grin when Peter growled at him.

“Fun fact! I wasn’t joking, I really do hate you,” Peter said and Chris chuckled.

Stiles grinned. “Awwww that’s so… creepy.” Peter glared. “But!” he added in a rush. “That’s totally ‘Peter’ for cute,” he added with a playful smile.

Peter huffed. “I was very young and very obsessed,” he defended.

Chris smiled a softer smile than before. “Peter was so young. I felt like trying to go for it would be unfair of me, so I stayed away. It ended up just making him resent me,” he admitted, but smiled. “Thankfully we got around that.”

Peter hummed, eyes shut against the sunlight. “We were very young, weren’t we, Dear?”

“I had a lot more hair, that’s for sure,” Chris said, running a hand over his head, wincing at his receding hairline.

Peter hummed. “I had far fewer grays, too.” He snickered suddenly. “Talia got so sick of me complaining about Chris just because I was angry I wanted him.” He looked at Stiles. “See, you’ve seen us bickering, but you weren’t around when I really hated him.”

Stiles laughed. “Oh yeah right, you never _hated_ him,” he dismissed and Chris and Peter shared an amused look.

“Actually he really did hate me,” Chris said openly. “He hated me a lot really.”

Peter nodded. “I love him _now_ ,” he said, waving a hand absently. “But at first I bitterly hated Chris. I wanted Talia to get rid of him. I wanted him as far from me as possible.” He grimaced. “I hated hunters, I hated Argents, and I hated nothing more than those two things together. I thought Talia was insane for letting Chris and Allison stay with us. I honestly thought he was going to kill us all one day and it made me angry that he seemed so genuinely upset by the way some of us thought that.”

Chris chuckled. “I was so guilty for what my family had done. I mean you were walking around with half your face burned and Derek didn’t talk for months and I just felt so responsible for it somehow. Allison was scared because she thought someone would hurt her since she was only a little girl but a few of the pack all said stuff about her being a hunter and her being afraid of them only made them more convinced she wasn’t supposed to be there and Talia was really the only one that entirely trusted me and Allison.” He shook his head. “It wasn’t a fun time at all. And Peter was angry at everything so he hated me even more.”

Peter nodded. “Yep,” he said with a pop on the ‘p’. “It was a long time before I realized I hated Chris but wanted to sleep with him too, and I was angry that I wanted him.”

“And it didn’t help I still sort of looked at him like he was a child,” Chris added and Peter groaned.

“Yes, the asshole, he treated me like one of my nieces or my nephew always.” He glared at Chris. “And then he started flirting back and it drove me insane,” Peter accused and Chris grinned.

He shrugged. “No denying that. You were so much younger I thought it was just you having some fun.” He gave Peter a fond smile. “Never thought Peter actually cared about me.”

Stiles smiled. “Awww, and isn’t he your mate?” he asked, and Peter nodded.

“What can I say? I was denying it really hard,” he joked. Peter smiled and closed his eyes, tipping his head towards the sun. “And now look at me. Been married for ages and seems like I’m stuck with him until one of us kicks the bucket. How boring.”

Stiles grinned when he saw the smile on Chris’s face as he watched Peter. Stiles could tell that, to Chris, Peter was still his favorite thing to look at no matter how many years they had been together. 

He only hoped that over a decade later, Derek still looked at him that way. 

~

There were few things in the entire world Stiles loved more than watching Derek smile a true, large, happy smile.

There was nothing in the entire world he hated worse than watching him cry. 

Stiles curled his fingers in Derek’s hair again, kissing his temple. “Shhhhh, it’s okay. It’s okay-“

“It’s my fault,” Derek choked out, his forehead pressed to Stiles’s chest, arms tight around his middle. “Stiles-“

“No,” Stiles said firmly, swallowing around the lump in his throat. “No, Derek. _No_.”

Their paperwork had been approved and they had spent an entire two weeks going every day to hang out with a six month old cub named Andre. They both adored the little boy. He was cheerful and curious and both of them were good with him. He seemed to like them both and they both wanted him so badly. 

But before they could even get to the point of introducing Alex and making sure it would be safe to take him home for a trial run, the alpha of a pack nearest to where Andre lived before becoming orphaned caught wind of Alpha Hale’s son trying to adopt Andre and he immediately shut down the proceedings, claiming his pack would take Andre before putting him in the hands of a ‘murderous’ pack like the Hale pack. The alpha knew what Derek had done to his wife and, more importantly, Stiles figured, what Peter had done to another pack’s beta.

Derek had been heartbroken to have Andre taken out of their grasp because of something that was his fault. Stiles was heartbroken that another child had ended up not being for them. He was even more heartbroken that Derek thought it was his fault all over again. “You should’ve never married me. You should’ve found somebody better, somebody who wasn’t such a terrible person-“

“Shut up,” Stiles gritted out, clenching his eyes shut. He twisted his fingers in Derek’s hair, pressing his lips to his hairline. “Don’t say that, Derek. Don’t you fucking dare.” He let out a weak sob as he pulled back far enough to press his lips between Derek’s eyes. “I married the right man. I married the best, most amazing person I’ve ever met. Nothing about this is your fault.” He pulled back again and kissed Derek hard. “I love you so much. I love you and I’ll never regret this. There will be other chances. We will have our second child. Maybe this wasn’t the one but- but it’s going to happen.”

“Apparently not!” Derek gritted out, eyes flicking up to Stiles’s. “Apparently we’re never going to be parents again. I’m a huge liability and apparently I can’t be trusted with a child even though I have one already-“

Stiles kissed him hard, shutting him up. Derek made a desperate sound against his lips and Stiles crawled into his lap, not caring that they were in the living room at the Hale house. Stiles kissed Derek until his lungs burned and he had to pull back with a gasp that bordered on a sob. His shoulders shook as he started crying. “Please, please stop, Derek,” he whimpered. He held Derek’s face in his hands. “Please. You’re hurting me by saying these things about yourself.”

Derek’s breath hitched and he looked guilty. “Stiles,” he breathed, and Stiles shook his head. He wiped at the tears on Derek’s face, ignoring the ones slipping down his own cheeks. “I’m sorry,” Derek whispered. “I know you don’t regret marrying me. I’m sorry.”

Stiles laughed weakly, tears tumbling down his cheeks. “I know it hurts. God knows I’m hurting over it.” He let his head fall against Derek’s. “But blaming yourself doesn’t make it better. Because you’re mine, okay?” He smiled sadly, cupping Derek’s cheek. “Whether we get another baby or not, _you_ are my husband. Mine. I picked you. I’m keeping you. And you blaming yourself and putting yourself down hurts me because I think you’re the best man I’ve ever met.” He shook his head. “Things will be okay.”

“But how can they be if I’m ruining everything?” Derek asked, looking so vulnerable and afraid, almost as if he wanted more than anything for Stiles to give him an answer.

Stiles kissed him gently. “I have to believe that things will get better. We’ve both suffered so much tragedy and been blessed with so much happiness in our lives. I have to believe that we will have more happiness in our search for another child.” He smiled warmly. “And I’ll never blame you for this one falling through.”

Derek sighed heavily. “I know. I know you won’t.” He curled his arms around Stiles, hugging him close. Stiles closed his eyes and held Derek in silence for the longest time before Derek spoke. “There will be another chance.”

Stiles smiled and nodded. “Our child is out there and we’ll find him or her.”

Derek closed his eyes and laid his head on Stiles’s shoulder, curling his arms right around his waist. “Promise?” he asked in a small, heartbreakingly fragile tone.

Stiles nodded, clinging to him tightly. “I promise.”

~

_Does it get better? by Stiles Stilinski-Hale_

_After the first cub didn’t like us, the second we thought we were going to get to introduce to Alex before an alpha claimed it, a third that Alex met but just couldn’t make himself comfortable with for some reason, and now a fourth that we barely met before an alpha showed up berating Hale werewolves and the pack of murderers we all are – the second alpha do to so in our quest to adopt now – I’m not sure if this is ever going to get easier._

_Derek and I dreamed of having a baby before Christmas. It’s now been six months of looking for a cub and I don’t know what we’re going to do. There aren’t many cubs available for adoption and we’re not the only couple trying to adopt by any means. One couple we met found their baby the first meeting, but another that was in the waiting room waiting with us came back from what they said was their eleventh meeting with a new cub in two years and they were giving up._

_Alex cried because he knew we were sad when he couldn’t be comfortable with the cub he met. He felt like he was hurting us. We were both so upset and he thought he was hurting his parents because he couldn’t make himself feel okay with the cub. It took us a week of trying to make him understand that we know he wants us to find a new baby and we know he didn’t say it just to make us sad before he finally forgave himself for hurting us._

_He’s three and a half years old and he was guilty over this._

_Derek is becoming depressed. He was very upset after the first alpha turned us away because we were Hales, but after the second one he’s started to become withdrawn. It’s not his fault, no matter how much he thinks it is. It’s not Derek the other alphas have issues with. Peter, Derek’s uncle, killed a beta from another pack defending his mate a few years ago. And the mate he defended grew up a hunter in a family with a legacy of the deplorable act. Derek feels guilty for being a Hale, which is the one thing none of us have any reason to be guilty for._

_The Hale Pack is a strong, diverse, peaceful pack and an incredible family to be a part of. I’m a human and even I can feel how strong our bond is. I respect and love my Alpha as if she was my family by blood not just marriage. My husband feeling guilty for something as wonderful as our family is makes me hurt in a way I didn’t know I could. Watching him suffer, watching him withdraw into himself, and watching him lose the hope he started out with hurts more than I can put into words._

_All we want is to adopt a child. There are so many human children out there and so few cubs but, because my husband is a werewolf, there are children waiting for a family while we’re waiting for a child and the fact we can’t be matched up has never made me angrier than I am at this point._

Stiles watched Derek lift his head, look towards the front wall of the house, and then abruptly stand without a word and walk towards the kitchen. Stiles frowned. “Derek?” he asked, putting his laptop aside as he stood. He followed Derek just in time to see Derek walking out the back door onto the deck. He looked at Alex, who was sitting at the table coloring and frowned. “Alex, did you hear something?” he asked, worry creeping in around the edges as he tried to imagine what would make Derek walk out like that without any warning.

Alex tilted his head, frowning. “Just a car,” he said, pointing towards the front of the house. “I think it’s Uncle Peter,” he said and Stiles grew even more confused as he looked out at the deck and saw Derek was nowhere to be seen.

“Huh,” Stiles said, walking over to Alex. “Come with me for a minute,” he said, picking Alex up just in case something was wrong. He headed towards the front door just as someone knocked. He opened the door and, as Alex predicted, Peter was there with Chris and Cora. “Hey, guys,” he said, letting them in and then putting Alex down again.

“Hey Stiles,” Cora said, then grabbed Alex up, making him squeal. “Hey buddy!” she said, putting him on her hip. “What’re you and Stiles doing?” she asked.

Alex looked at Stiles, and Stiles made a face. “It’s nothing. I just grabbed him cause Derek was being odd and I worried maybe something was wrong,” he said, still not sure what had happened with Derek. 

“Where is my dear nephew?” Peter asked, looking around with an eyebrow raised as Chris and Cora went to sit on the couch with Alex.

Stiles bit his lip, brow furrowing. “I’m… not sure,” he said and Cora looked up, noticing his demeanor.

“Is everything okay?” she asked and he walked towards the hall without answering. He walked to the back door and looked out, but didn’t see Derek. The sun was setting but it wasn’t dark yet, so there was no shadows deep enough for Derek to hide in yet. “Stiles?” she called and he turned to see her and Peter walking into the living room. “Where’s Derek?”

He sighed, shaking his head. “I don’t know.” He looked back outside. “He just… walked out.” He looked back at them. “He looked up like he heard something then just came in here and walked out the back door. I asked Alex what he heard and he said it was Peter’s car, but… I don’t know what the hell Derek’s doing.”

Cora shot Peter a look. “Did you piss him off recently?” she asked and he shook his head.

“Hey, not that I know of!” he defended.

Stiles sighed, putting his face in his hands. “If you pissed him off, I’m going to be so angry, Peter. He’s really not doing well,” he said in a warning tone.

Peter held up a hand. “Look, we bicker, it’s what we do. I’m sorry if he’s a little delicate lately. He’ll suck it up and be over it soon.”

Stiles snorted. “I hope so,” he said, then followed them both back to the living room. He went to scoop up Alex and settle with him in his lap while Chris continued talking to Alex about Alex’s drawings and asking him about things. Stiles kissed Alex’s hair and smiled at his description of his blue cat drawing.

~

It wasn’t until after Stiles made Alex dinner – and Derek still hadn’t returned – that he started to really worry.

~

It wasn’t until he had to put Alex in bed alone that he started to fully panic. It was nearly impossible to get Alex to bed since he could sense Stiles’s panic, but he had to convince him he was worried about work – since it wasn’t a total lie – to make him go to bed.

As soon as he had shut Alex’s door he grabbed his phone and called Derek again. He’d called him once just before dinner and he didn’t answer. His panic really got bad when he realized in the now-silent living room that he could hear the buzzing of Derek’s phone between the sofa cushions. He pulled it out and realized Derek didn’t have his phone wherever he went. He took a rasping breath and ran to the back door. He rushed out on to the back deck, looking around worriedly into the darkness. “Derek?” he called, trying not to call any louder than he had to so Alex didn’t wake up and come looking. “Derek, where are you?!” 

He waited. And waited.

And waited more.

But after ten minutes, when Derek didn’t come walking from the woods, he made a decision and walked off the deck, phone to his ear. “Stiles?” Chris asked upon answering. “It’s nearly ten, what’s wrong?”

Stiles sniffled against the cold as he walked into the forest, not straying too far from the house in case Alex needed him, but far enough Alex wouldn’t hear him. “Derek never came home. I’m outside calling his name but he hasn’t howled to tell me where he is. I know we have work tomorrow, but I need- I need help finding him,” he choked out as tears finally started falling. “Chris, Derek’s just- just gone! What if he wandered off and got hurt?! What if he’s lying somewhere with a broken leg that isn’t healing?!”

“Just stay at the house, I’ll be there soon,” Chris said, and then hung up. Stiles tucked his phone in his pocket and walked a little further into the woods, staying within sight of the house just in case. He looked around. “Derek?” he sobbed softly. “Oh God, don’t do this to me,” he whimpered, putting his face in his hands. He walked in a semi-circle around the house, all the way to the front of the house. He could hear a car coming up the driveway and he headed back towards the back yard since Chris would be able to look around out front of the house.

He walked back into the forest and called Derek’s name a few times before finally just leaning against a tree along the edge of the back yard. “Oh God!” He let out a weak cry before straightening up. “DEREK?!” he shouted, looking around the forest. “WHERE ARE YOU, DEREK!”

“Stiles?!” he heard a voice call from the back deck and he turned to see Talia standing in front of the open door looking his way. He started to walk towards her when a hand grabbed his wrist and another settled over his mouth to muffle the scream me let out. He jerked away only to relax a little when he saw it was Derek.

“Stiles, what the hell are you doing?!” Derek asked in a hushed tone, looking confused.

Stiles’s relief gave way to anger. “LOOKING FOR YOU, YOU DUMBASS!” he shouted right in Derek’s face, glaring. “What the fuck, Derek, where were you?!”

Derek’s jaw set. “I went for a walk, why is my mom here?” he asked and Stiles scoffed in disbelief.

“A walk? A _walk_?!” He growled. “Your mother is here because it’s nearly eleven at night, you left around six, and I panicked when my husband disappeared on me!” he shouted, turning to stalk back to the house. “A fucking walk. That’s hysterical,” he muttered as he stomped across the yard.

“Eleven?! Oh God, Stiles, I’m sorry,” Derek said, rushing to catch up with him. “Crap, I’m so sorry, I forgot my phone, so I didn’t know how much time passed-“

“Oh, I know,” Stiles said, holding up Derek’s phone without looking at him. “I tried calling you about fifteen times before I heard it buzzing in the couch cushions.”

As they got closer to the deck, Talia’s face became visible. She frowned. “Stiles, is everything okay?”

Stiles huffed. “Oh yeah, just fine, apparently! Somebody fucking decided to go for a walk and lost track of time!” he said in a sarcastically cheery voice that made Derek wince.

“Stiles, I’m sorry! I just needed to get out of the house-“

“THEN YOU TELL ME THAT!” Stiles snarled, spinning around to look down at Derek from the second step while Derek stood on the ground. “Goddammit, Derek, Alex kept asking where you were and I had to make shit up! You could’ve just said ‘I’m going for a walk’ and taken your phone and it would’ve been nothing! Hell! You could’ve said ‘I’m going to be out until nearly eleven’ and I’d have been okay!”

Derek gave him an apologetic look. “Stiles, I’m sorry, I just- I just couldn’t handle Peter right then and I needed some space and I had to get out of there-“

“Derek, I _get that_ ,” Stiles stressed. He put his face in his hands. “God, Derek, I’m trying to tell you that I’m only upset because you just walked out! You just walked out, no warning, and didn’t come home!”

Derek ducked his head. “I’m sorry I made you angry,” he said in a small tone and Stiles gritted his teeth.

“It isn’t anger, Derek,” he grumbled, taking a heavy breath to try and clam down. “Derek, dude, I love you so much that my first thought is worry, okay? I worried that you had fallen off a damn cliff or something. I worried you got hurt and needed help and nobody knew where you were. I’m not angry you were out, I’m upset because you made me worry myself to _tears_!” He let out a weak sob, putting his face in his hands. “Derek, what’s wrong with you?” he cried softly. “Why would you do that to me-“

“I’m so sorry,” Derek whispered in a hoarse tone, curling his arms around Stiles, pulling him into a hug. “I’m so sorry, Stiles-“

“No,” Stiles snapped, shoving Derek off. “Don’t touch me,” he choked out, wiping at his cheeks. “Not- not right now,” he said, sniffling as he saw the hurt in Derek’s eyes when he backed away from him. “I just can’t right now,” he said, turning and passing Talia to go into the house. He didn’t answer Chris or Peter’s worried calls after him as he ran down the hall and ducked into the bedroom, shutting and locking the door behind him. He kicked off his shoes and didn’t bother with any other clothes as he all but dove into bed, pulling the covers around his head as he pressed his face into the pillow and cried.

He knew he was overreacting, but after all the stress he’d been under lately, Derek’s strange actions were just enough to make the dam break. He couldn’t help but curl into his pillow and let it all out.

~

Derek stared at the back door, feeling an overwhelming chill settle over him as he heard Stiles run crying down the hall and slam a door, ignoring Chris and Peter asking him if he was okay. He was distracted from listening by Talia walking over, arms crossed as she looked at him with concern. “Mom…” He bit his lip, unsure what to say.

She sighed and stepped closer, pulling Derek into a hug. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” she asked, kissing his hair as he sank into her arms hugging her tight. “What happened tonight?”

He whimpered softly. “I don’t know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me anymore,” he breathed. “I’m just… I’m so angry. At everything. And when I’m not angry, I’m hurting. And I don’t like feeling this way anymore.” His voice cracked and he turned his face into Talia’s neck. “Another alpha rejected us because I’m a Hale,” he admitted to her, the first time he or Stiles had brought it up since they were rejected a few days ago.

Talia groaned. “Oh Derek, I’m so sorry.” She pulled back some and swiped at his face. “Derek, it’s not your fault-“

“I know it’s not, it’s Peter and Chris,” he said tightly. “That’s why I couldn’t be here when they came today. I just- I couldn’t handle it.” He shook his head, jaw tight. “I couldn’t handle looking at my own family because they’re the reason we keep losing chances at having another child. Mom, I haven’t hated Peter or Chris in a long time but lately I just- I don’t like them. I don’t want to be around them. This crap is getting to me and I hate feeling this way!” he admitted, voice full of guilt. “I hate myself for being angry at them for something that isn’t their fault and it makes it worse. And it kills Stiles when he can tell I hate myself. It hurts him so badly for me to feel bad about being who I am and that makes it all worse!” He sniffled, shaking his head. “The last few days I’ve felt worse than I have since- since the bombing,” he said and Talia’s face fell some. “I didn’t even feel this bad after Jennifer. It’s like- like everything hurts and hurting hurts Stiles and that makes it all hurt _worse_ ,” he stressed. “What happens when we start hurting Alex?” he asked weakly. “God, and I’m so _stupid_! Tonight I didn’t even- I just-“ He put his face in his hands. “I didn’t know how long I was gone. I just started walking and didn’t stop. I didn’t realize anything was wrong until I heard Stiles yelling my name. What if something had happened to Alex while I was gone? I’m so fucking stupid-“

“Derek, you’re depressed, not stupid,” Talia soothed, pulling him into a hug. “Oh my baby boy,” she whispered, kissing his head. “I’m so sorry this is happening to you and Stiles. I’m so, so sorry.”

Derek sniffled, tucking his face into her neck. “The worst part of it all is knowing, like Stiles has said from the start, there are so many human children out there just waiting for parents and we can’t have one of them. This is only being this difficult because I’m a werewolf. If I was human, we may couldn’t find a little baby but there are plenty of kids around Alex’s age that we could have. There are so few cubs and so many obstacles for us and if there weren’t any stupid laws we would have a child by now.”

“I know,” Talia sighed against his shoulder. “It makes me so angry, Derek. I’m trying to drum up interest, but it’s just so hard to get back into politics when I’m still trying to run this magazine. But I am trying. I want you and Stiles to have however many children you want, Sweetheart.”

Derek smiled. “I know you do, Mom.”

She pulled back some and smiled at him. “Besides, I need more grandchildren. Chris has one kid and two grandkids, I’ve got three kids and one grandkid. Your sisters aren’t having any anytime soon, so you need to give me more,” she joked and Derek managed a laugh. She kissed his face. “It’s going to get better, Derek. I promise.”

He nodded, biting his lip. “I love you, Mom,” he said and she smiled, leaning their foreheads together.

“I love you, too, Sweetheart. Always and forever,” she said, hugging him close again.

~

Stiles wasn’t quite awake yet when he walked out of the bathroom after brushing his teeth, so when he walked out the bedroom and tripped and fell into the hallway, he wasn’t that surprised. However, when he didn’t hit the ground, but instead was caught around the waist so that the impact on his knees wasn’t bad and he didn’t fall flat on his face, he was a little surprised. He twisted and saw Derek kneeling beside him. “You okay?” Derek asked, voice rough from sleep.

Stiles looked back and realized with a pang that Derek had been sleeping on the floor outside their bedroom. “Derek, did you sleep on the _floor_?” he asked, sitting back on his heels as Derek let go of him and sat back against the wall.

Derek looked down at his hands, biting his lip. “I couldn’t sleep on the couch cause I couldn’t hear your heartbeat,” he mumbled reluctantly, but Stiles’s gut twisted.

“Aw, hell,” he groaned, then twisted to sit against the wall beside Derek. He reached out and pulled Derek’s hand into his lap, smiling sadly at the heartbreakingly hopeful look in Derek’s eyes. Stiles laid his head on Derek’s shoulder, his right hand laced through Derek’s left while he stroked the back of Derek’s hand and wrist with his free hand. “I’m sorry I locked the door,” he said, closing his eyes as he nuzzled into Derek’s shoulder.

Stiles kissed Derek’s knuckles and smiled when Derek leaned a cheek against the side of his head. “I’m sorry I’m not a very good husband right now,” Derek muttered, and Stiles’s chest clenched so hard he couldn’t even breathe for a moment.

Stiles whimpered and turned, pulling his hand out of Derek’s to throw his arms around Derek, clutching at him tightly. “Don’t say that, Derek,” he pleaded. He kissed his head. “God, you’re not a bad husband. Don’t ever think that. You’re a good husband and I love you so much.” He pulled back and kissed Derek sweetly. “You’re not a bad husband, you’re just not doing very well right now. I don’t blame you.”

Derek frowned. “But last night-“

“Last night I freaked out, you scared me. I wasn’t angry, I was upset,” he said, stroking Derek’s hair sweetly. He looked into his eyes. “Derek… are you okay? And don’t lie to me.”

Derek sighed, leaning his head against Stiles’s. “Not really,” he said softly. “I just don’t feel happy about my life lately.” Stiles’s heart clenched. Derek smiled sadly. “I’m angry. All the time. And I hate that. I feel guilty because I’m angry, Stiles. I haven’t felt this shitty since I finally got over the bombing,” he admitted and Stiles’s breath hitched.

“Oh Derek,” he sighed, kissing him sweetly. “I’m here with you, okay? It’s going to get better.”

Derek huffed. “But what if it doesn’t?”

Stiles bit his lip, looking Derek in the eyes. “Do… do you want to take a break in the adoption search?” he asked.

Derek looked up, eyes wide. “What- what do you mean?”

Stiles smiled sadly. “Derek, this is hurting you really badly. It’s hurting our family. I don’t want you to feel this way.”

Derek frowned. “But you want a cub-“

“Yes,” Stiles said softly. “But I have a husband already.” He stroked his jaw. “Derek, we’ve been married one year. We have plenty of time if we need to take a break for you to try and come out of this low spot.” 

Derek eyed him curiously. “But… I don’t want to,” he said, and Stiles raised an eyebrow. “Stiles, we’ve come this far. We’ve put so much into this. I don’t want to wait. I want a cub. That’s why this is hurting me so badly, I _want_ another cub,” he stressed. “I feel like I won’t feel any better than I do now until we have another child and I have proof that I’m not unworthy like I do now.”

Stiles groaned, hugging Derek. “Okay, okay.” He sighed. “We’re going to have another child. I know it. I will help you however I can until we get one. Whatever you need from me, I’ll try and make you feel better when you are feeling down.”

Derek hugged him tightly, shaking his head. “I just need you to not give up on me. That’s all I need, Stiles. You are the best thing that’s happened to me and Alex and as long as you don’t leave me alone in all this, I’ve got hope that it will get better.”

“Of course it’s going to get better.” Stiles kissed him sweetly. “We’ve just started this whole ‘rest of our lives together’ thing. We’ve got so much getting better to happen, don’t we?”

Derek smiled and nodded. “Definitely.”

~

 

The first thing Stiles asked when they got to the office to meet their next prospective cub, before Derek got in from going to park the car, was about whether or not another alpha was going to show up and take this one away, too.

“I really doubt that,” Sarah said as they waited for Derek. “This one had a pack, and nobody in it wanted her.”

Stiles’s heart skipped a beat. “Wait… so a cub had a pack but they didn’t _want_ her?” he asked, horrified.

Sarah nodded, looking at the paperwork. “Her parents died in a car accident a year and a half ago. She was only eight months old. But they didn’t want her. After a couple months of none of the rest of the pack wanting her, they gave her up to the state. She’s been living in state care since.”

“Why?” Stiles asked, unable to imagine the Hale pack doing something like that. “Why would they do that? Why would a pack not have anybody who wanted a baby if they could take care of her?” 

“Well,” Sarah started, but then stopped when Derek walked in off the elevator. “Well, how about we go in and meet her and you’ll see.”

Derek bumped shoulders with Stiles as they followed her down the hall to the meeting room. “See what?”

Stiles shook his head. “I don’t know, but Derek… this cub has a pack but they _didn’t want her_ and gave her away,” he whispered, and Derek’s eyes widened in shock. “What could make someone do that?”

Derek shook his head. “I have no clue,” he muttered, looking as worried as Stiles was. 

When they walked into the room, Sarah introduced them to a woman. “Hi, I’m Hannah, I’m the one who has been looking after Molly for the past few months,” she said, shaking both of their hands. “Now,” she said, looking at Sarah. “Do we want to talk about her some, or just let them meet her right off?” she asked.

“FISHY NOOOO!” A little girl’s shout interrupted, and it seemed to answer for them all because, a moment later, a little girl with curly red hair in braided pigtails came running around the corner from where all the toys to keep the children entertained were. “Fishy broke!” she said, holding up a stuffed fish that was missing a fin. She stopped, however, and lowered the fish, staring curiously up at Derek. She tilted her head some, staring at him with big brown eyes before holding up the fish. “Want fishy?” she asked in a sweet little voice that made Stiles smile. His smile grew when Derek squatted down and let her hand him the fish.

“What happened to him?” he asked, and the little girl shrugged.

“Dunno. Broke,” she said, waving the floppy little fin at Derek next. “Dumb fish,” she said with a grumpy pout before tossing the fin over her shoulder carelessly.

Derek smiled brightly and offered her the fish back. “What’s your name?” he asked softly.

She smiled. “I Molly,” she said. “Who you?”

Derek held out his hand. “Hi, Molly, I’m Derek,” he said, and she grabbed his finger, shaking his hand that way.

Stiles couldn’t help the overwhelming swell of affection he had for his husband when he watched him interact with the little girl in front of him. “Hi, Molly,” he said, kneeling down beside Derek. “I’m Stiles,” he said and she frowned.

“Whas a ‘Tiles’?” she asked, and Derek snickered.

“It’s his name,” he said, and she just eyed him doubtfully. 

“Okay,” she said simply, then grabbed Stiles and Derek by a couple fingers each and tugged at them. “Play wif me!” she said, and they both let her pull them along to the corner with toys and puzzles, settling down to play with her.

It wasn’t until she got frustrated with a puzzle and growled that they realized why she might be unwanted. Her eyes flashed, but it wasn’t the normal beta gold.

Her eyes flashed blue.

Derek and Stiles both stilled instantly, shocked by what they had just seen. “Did she-“

“I don’t even-“ Derek stopped and Stiles nodded, standing up first before offering Derek a hand. “Molly, we need to go talk to Ms. Hannah, okay?” Derek asked, and she nodded absently, still trying to figure out where the wooden puzzle piece in her hand went. 

When they got over to Sarah and Hannah, Sarah had a sad smile on her face and Hannah looked somewhat dejected. “Yeah, there’s that,” Hannah said, and Derek looked to Sarah.

“Why?” he asked softly, and she shrugged.

“Nobody knows.” She offered him the file on Molly. “She’s a little over two years old, she’s never been involved in anything that should make her eyes be blue, but for some reason they are. They’ve never been gold as far as we can tell. I’m assuming it’s just some form of birth defect.”

Stiles paled. “Her pack didn’t want her because of a _birth defect_?!” he asked in an angry whisper. “She’s a child-“

“Who will grow up to be an adult who looks like she’s killed someone,” Sarah added and Stiles scoffed.

“And?! Blue eyes doesn’t make you a murderer. And nobody has to show their eyes, most werewolves never shift in public, you mean to say her pack are ashamed of her for something that she never has to show in public?!” he asked angrily. “She’s a little kid-“

“Stiles, it’s not like we think this,” Sarah said gently. “I agree, she’s just a little kid. But some people don’t agree. Some packs don’t want blue eyes in their midst.”

Hannah looked hopeful at his outburst. “Does- does that mean you’re not calling it off now?” she asked.

Derek looked up and flashed her his eyes, startling her into putting a hand over her mouth. “I’m not a murderer in case you’re wondering,” he added dryly and she shook her head.

“And Derek isn’t the only one in our pack with the same trait,” Stiles added. “Obviously, our pack doesn’t have so much judgment thrown around as her old pack.” He looked back at Molly. “You mean to say the reason nobody has adopted her is just her eyes?” he asked weakly.

Hannah nodded. “Even her caretakers before me quit. It freaked them out too bad.”

Derek gritted his teeth. “She’s just a baby, how could they act that way-“

“I DID IT!” They both turned and looked to see Molly holding her arms up. “Look!” she said, flapping her hands at the puzzle as she looked over at them. “Derek! ‘Tiles! Did it!” she cried, wiggling around excitedly as she pointed at the puzzle completed in front of her.

Stiles watched all of Derek’s anger at how she’d been treated fade as he wordlessly walked away from the conversation to go praise Molly’s puzzle. He watched as Derek sat down beside her and helped her grab another puzzle and let her sit on his lap so they could work on it together. Stiles turned back to Sarah and Hannah and hoped desperately that this time maybe things would go right. “We have no issues with her eyes being blue,” he said flat out, leaving no room for argument.

Sarah looked relieved and Hannah looked excited. “Let’s talk about her then, Stiles,” she said, guiding Stiles over to a larger, more adult friendly table so they could start really talking about Molly and her situation.

~

Derek and Stiles had spent six days over two weeks spending all day with Molly. They were confident that she would be a wonderful fit for them, but they still had to introduce her to Alex and then to Talia before they could take her home for the trial period. “I’m gonna meet the new baby now?” Alex asked as he held Stiles’s hand while they crossed the parking lot.

Stiles nodded. “She’s not exactly a baby, she’s only about a year younger than you, but yep, we’re meeting Daddy and Molly now.” He smiled down at Alex. “You’re sure being a sweet little boy about all this. I know things haven’t been easy since we started looking for a new baby,” he said and Alex looked up at him, frowning.

“But… the babies don’t have daddies. We gotta get one!” he said and Stiles’s chest tightened as he saw how much conviction Alex had in saying that he wasn’t just alright with it, but he _wanted_ to share his parents with another child.

Stiles picked Alex up when they got in the elevator and hugged him hard, pressing his face into Alex’s hair. “I love you so much, dude. You have no idea how happy I am that you’re my little boy and that you want a new sister,” he said, squeezing him tight once more before putting him down.

Alex just rolled his eyes in a way very reminiscent of Derek and grabbed Stiles’s hand, tugging at him when the elevator doors opened. “Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled and Stiles chuckled because clearly Derek wasn’t the only one rubbing off on Alex.

When they got to the play room, Stiles opened the door and smiled nervously at Derek, who was sitting with Molly playing tea party with her. “Look who has arrived,” he said, walking over with Alex. He almost expected Alex to be shy, but Alex looked at Molly curiously, tilting his head. 

Derek smiled. “Hey Molly,” he said, nudging her. “We want you to meet somebody, okay?” he asked, and Molly looked up, glancing over at Alex. “Molly, this is Alex, he’s my and Stiles’s son,” he said. “Alex, this is Molly,” he said, and Alex walked over and sat down in the little kid chair beside Molly, across from Derek.

“I’m Alex,” he said, then continued straight on. “Why’s your hair like that?” he asked and Stiles winced.

Molly just tugged at her braid, frowning. “Cause,” she said as if it was obvious and Alex shrugged.

“Cool. My nana’s eyes are that color,” he said and Molly nodded.

“‘Kay,” she said simply, handing him a cup. “Tea,” she instructed, pouring him an imaginary cup of tea. Alex looked at the empty cup and Stiles worried for a second he might not know how to play tea party, since he liked to play school with his toys instead, but he just shrugged.

“Tea’s icky,” he said, and Molly nodded.

“Yeah, but gotta,” she said, pouring Derek more ‘tea’ before picking up her own teacup.

Stiles came over and moved the chair to sit on the floor on the empty side of the table, and Derek slid his hand into Stiles’s under the table, sharing a small smile with him. Stiles squeezed his hand and watched Molly and Alex interacting with hope for the first time in a while.

~

_Our Little Girl by Stiles Stilinski-Hale_

_We signed the final papers and Talia officially accepted our Molly into the pack just this morning._

_I cannot express to you how happy I am. Derek and I have our second child. Molly is ours now. She’s officially our little girl. And just like Derek predicted, she is ours just in time for Christmas. We worried her being adopted might feel different, and on some level, Derek doesn’t have the exact same connection with her that he does with Alex, but it’s not like she’s any less his cub. He loves her just as much as he loves Alex and there is that same pack bond as anybody else has. We all feel it with her, even little ‘ol human me._

_Alex and Molly get along great. She’s old enough that Alex can play with her and teach her things, and he seems to really love his new sister. He also has a little partner in crime now, which is as amusing as it is exasperating. Nothing like somebody to act as look out for when he’s up to no good whereas before he was to worried about getting caught. Derek and I have woke up many mornings to find the kids already up and making a mess in the hallway because they don’t have to wait for their daddies to wake up to play with them since they have each other. Derek loves it. I can tell he loves that Alex has what he had growing up finally. Derek had so many siblings when he was little and now Alex has what Derek enjoyed so much. I never had a sibling and it wasn’t bad, but I definitely can tell that it’s like if my best friend Scott had lived in the same house as me when we were little, and that’s pretty awesome to imagine._

_As happy as we are, it’s just another reminder that other families aren’t as lucky as we are. Other werewolves didn’t find their cub. Some parents had to give up where we kept fighting. At one point, I thought giving up was our only chance at happiness when Derek was in the depths of depression, and so many other families had to give up because of nothing more than their species. I don’t want my best friend to go through this. I want him to be able to adopt a child without having to wait for the right cub. Yes, human adoption is still a long struggle, but some human children are the right match for some non-human parents, and because of a stupid law those parents aren’t able to find the child meant to be theirs._

_Molly is the best thing to happen to our little family since Derek and I got together, but one day we’ll want another child, and one day we’ll have to go through all of this again, and we found one cub, who’s to say we’ll ever find another?_

_Hopefully when the day comes we decide to adopt another child, we’ll be able to adopt a human child and give a human child the home it deserves and a family that loves it regardless of our respective species._

“Daddy!” Molly cried, running around and around the table in the Hale house. “Daddy, wanna do lights!” she complained, waving a length of ribbon from the gifts Laura was wrapping above her head as she ran. 

“Yeah, Daddy, can we turn them on _noooow_?!” Alex pleaded, giving Derek big, wide puppy eyes. “It’s almost dark-“

“Alex,” Derek said with a laugh. “It’s not dark yet. What good is it turning on the Christmas lights on the house if you can’t see them in the daytime?”

Stiles snickered at the exasperated but amused look on Derek’s face. “Aww, but _Daddy_ ,” he whined playfully and Derek shot him a glare.

“Don’t egg them on,” he warned and Stiles grinned when Molly and Alex both ran up to Derek, pouting up at him.

“Pleeeeeease Daddy?!”

“Peeese?!”

Alex and Molly both pouted, giving him big, wide eyed puppy looks. Stiles had to put a hand over his mouth to not laugh as he watched Derek visibly losing the battle against twin pouts turned on him. “But…” Derek sighed. “You can’t see anything, guys,” he tried weakly, and Molly threw in a little lip wibble. Stiles snorted, biting his fist when Derek lost the fight and deflated some. “Alright, alright, fine. Go tell Uncle Peter to turn them on,” he relented, gesturing to the hall.

“YAY!” they both cried as they tore out running down the hall. “UNCA PEETA!” Molly called and Alex whooped excitedly.

Stiles finally gave up and burst out laughing as Derek gave him a grumpy look. “You’re a horrible influence,” Derek proclaimed and Stiles grinned, walking around the counter to grab Derek’s shirt.

“Awww, you love me,” he said, tugging Derek in until they were chest to chest. “Admit it, you’re just a giant softie,” he cooed, pecking Derek’s lips.

Derek harrumphed against his mouth, but chased his lips when Stiles pulled back some. “Yeah yeah,” he grumbled, sliding his arms around Stiles to kiss him slowly. “I ruined any chance of being a stern man when I chose to surround myself with stupidly puppy-like eyes,” he said and Stiles beamed.

“Yeah, you married the wrong man and had the wrong kids for that one, buddy,” he joked, smacking a kiss to Derek’s cheek before pulling out of his arms. “Alright, go make sure the kids don’t eat Peter, I’ve got to finish this pie,” he said, only to have Derek catch his hand and pull him back for one more hug.

“Hey Stiles,” he said, face buried in the crook of Stiles’s neck. Stiles hummed, hugging him back. “Thank you.”

Stiles raised an eyebrow. “For what?” he asked, and Derek shrugged, inhaling his scent and letting out a happy growl. “Derek?” 

“For just… being Stiles,” Derek said, pulling back to give Stiles the most warm, happy smile ever. 

Stiles grinned slyly. “You love me, don’t you,” he teased ned Derek rolled his eyes.

“Yes, though I question that sometimes,” he joked and Stiles gave him a scandalized laugh, shoving him playfully.

“Ha ha,” he said, then kissed Derek’s cheek again. “I love you, too, ya dork. Now.” He slapped Derek on the butt, making him jump. “Go to the kids.”

Derek smiled and nodded, turning to walk out. “Gotta go help the kids terrorize Peter,” he agreed and Stiles laughed as he turned back to the stove. He set the timer and looked back at the counter, smiling brightly as he caught sight of the latest issue of _Fangs & Fur_ sitting on the corner. It was the issue with his article featured, but the cover was the best part.

It was a picture of him with Alex in his arms and Derek with Molly in his, their whole family together and happy for the world to see.

**Author's Note:**

> I have some future small things I want to do, but this is probably the last 20K+ fic for this series. 
> 
> What else do you guys want to see?


End file.
